I don't feel very well. I tend to be a critic and I tend to be negative. I fix my eyes on Christ. I see nothing else, but Him. I find my hope, my peace, my healing all through Him. When I look into this world I question good just like I question evil. It's not a good attitude, I know. God is the only thing that makes everything in this world happen; good or bad. My character is built on solid rock. I challenge myself daily to become the best "me" possible. The craving has gone beyond understanding of why I live my life totally surrendering to the one who gave His life for me. I pray that I can be in the presence of the spirit as much as possible. Be weird.
The past months and the past weeks haven't been so easy. It's okay. I embrace the stress, the challenge, and the trials. I pray. I continue to live graciously in the grace that was given to me. Thankful for the things that I have. Would I want more? Off course. I definitely want more. I want to grow. I want to live shining brightly. However, it's not easy. I desire life, but to gain one is to lose one. I want more to this life that we have now. By His great love I am alive.
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
National Prayer Day
My prayer,
God.... I need you! I want you! You are LOVE, I love you! Oh man... I haven't been having an amazing week. I don't need an amazing week, I realize that I have You. I don't need a response from the girl that I like. I have You. I don't need parents checking on their son. I have you as my father in heaven. I don't need to get caught up about making enough to provide for my future family. I know that You will provide. Thank you! You have blessed me with your Grace. You've been so patient with me and have been so forgiving for the sins that I have committed. I don't want to disappoint you anymore. I want to live for you and according to your will. Let my wants and needs be you. Let me wake up in the morning praying to you and not wondering what my to-do list looks like or what I'm wearing. I want to love and appreciate You and all that you have created. I want to work for your kingdom. Even in the science field. You made all things! Even in relationships. They are your sons and daughters. I ask that you take this fear away from me. I want to put on this armor and fight this battle with you as my sword and shield. I want to impress You, Lord GOD, and not the people around me, or the girl that I adore. Give me the courage to follow my words and take them into action. Actions that's glorifying you and be to the best of my abilities. You know my strengths and weaknesses. Fill my lack of effort with your love. Reduce my love for myself, and convert that to my love for you. Let my selfishness be for You and my brothers & sisters. You are just, God. And You take care of all those who are in need of You. You know my prayers more than anyone else. I love you Lord. I am your servant forever. I don't deserve this life, but you gave this to me to enjoy the wonders of your creation and to serve you. Let my focus be You. I want to be reminded daily that you're more important than my life. Your spirit lives in me and with me. I want my thoughts to be for your glory. I want my thoughts and wants for the better of your kingdom. I want you, Jesus!!! I love you! The power and will of me loving you is You. You gave me all these gifts and talents. I'm sorry if I haven't been able to maximize them for You. I feel empty right now. I feel alone. God, I ask that you fill my cup. God, ask that you speak to me. God, I ask that you show me the way in which you want me to go. The joy is fading. I want to delight in You, in times of being in judged, being rejected, being poor, being sick, being a failure, and being a sinner. I need you badly. Oh man... You have the power to move mountains and raise people from the dead. Change my heart. Thank you for worship that makes me cry all the time. Thank you for making me cry. Thank for my heart hurting. I just want to be in your presence God. There's so much going on in this world. I'm overwhelmed by the world. I don't want that. I just want you, God. You're more important than making a living, relationships, my status, my identity, my health, my legacy. You have to be incorporated to all of that. I must confess that lately, you haven't been. And now I'm broken and in tears begging you to come back in my life. I want you back, and I know that you never left. I won't make any excuses. I admit to my mistakes and the lack of actions. I want to change for the best. God, you are the best. Everything else is temporary. Let You be with me on this world. I know that I can't do this all on my own. I can't go to work alone, I can't eat alone, I can't date alone, I can't serve alone, I can't be alone. I know you're with me everywhere I go. And lately I've been pushing you away and having things my way. I don't want to use your name to get the things that I want. I want to use your name to get what you want and to glorify you more to the nth degree. I love you Lord. My prayer is to be in constant prayer. My constant prayer is to be lifting you higher. You're beautiful.
Amen.
God.... I need you! I want you! You are LOVE, I love you! Oh man... I haven't been having an amazing week. I don't need an amazing week, I realize that I have You. I don't need a response from the girl that I like. I have You. I don't need parents checking on their son. I have you as my father in heaven. I don't need to get caught up about making enough to provide for my future family. I know that You will provide. Thank you! You have blessed me with your Grace. You've been so patient with me and have been so forgiving for the sins that I have committed. I don't want to disappoint you anymore. I want to live for you and according to your will. Let my wants and needs be you. Let me wake up in the morning praying to you and not wondering what my to-do list looks like or what I'm wearing. I want to love and appreciate You and all that you have created. I want to work for your kingdom. Even in the science field. You made all things! Even in relationships. They are your sons and daughters. I ask that you take this fear away from me. I want to put on this armor and fight this battle with you as my sword and shield. I want to impress You, Lord GOD, and not the people around me, or the girl that I adore. Give me the courage to follow my words and take them into action. Actions that's glorifying you and be to the best of my abilities. You know my strengths and weaknesses. Fill my lack of effort with your love. Reduce my love for myself, and convert that to my love for you. Let my selfishness be for You and my brothers & sisters. You are just, God. And You take care of all those who are in need of You. You know my prayers more than anyone else. I love you Lord. I am your servant forever. I don't deserve this life, but you gave this to me to enjoy the wonders of your creation and to serve you. Let my focus be You. I want to be reminded daily that you're more important than my life. Your spirit lives in me and with me. I want my thoughts to be for your glory. I want my thoughts and wants for the better of your kingdom. I want you, Jesus!!! I love you! The power and will of me loving you is You. You gave me all these gifts and talents. I'm sorry if I haven't been able to maximize them for You. I feel empty right now. I feel alone. God, I ask that you fill my cup. God, ask that you speak to me. God, I ask that you show me the way in which you want me to go. The joy is fading. I want to delight in You, in times of being in judged, being rejected, being poor, being sick, being a failure, and being a sinner. I need you badly. Oh man... You have the power to move mountains and raise people from the dead. Change my heart. Thank you for worship that makes me cry all the time. Thank you for making me cry. Thank for my heart hurting. I just want to be in your presence God. There's so much going on in this world. I'm overwhelmed by the world. I don't want that. I just want you, God. You're more important than making a living, relationships, my status, my identity, my health, my legacy. You have to be incorporated to all of that. I must confess that lately, you haven't been. And now I'm broken and in tears begging you to come back in my life. I want you back, and I know that you never left. I won't make any excuses. I admit to my mistakes and the lack of actions. I want to change for the best. God, you are the best. Everything else is temporary. Let You be with me on this world. I know that I can't do this all on my own. I can't go to work alone, I can't eat alone, I can't date alone, I can't serve alone, I can't be alone. I know you're with me everywhere I go. And lately I've been pushing you away and having things my way. I don't want to use your name to get the things that I want. I want to use your name to get what you want and to glorify you more to the nth degree. I love you Lord. My prayer is to be in constant prayer. My constant prayer is to be lifting you higher. You're beautiful.
Amen.
Monday, April 30, 2012
April Fools
Hi. I know there has been a hold on this blog. I seem to find the time to think and outline my thoughts, yet not get to them on here. It's almost over a month since I've written something on this thing. I keep doing that. I keep doing the wrong things. I keep working on the same things. I keep failing other people. I keep doubting at myself. Obviously it hasn't been a good month. Personally, the month's been good, it could just get better. Everything else can get better.
The self has stepped away for the month of April. In a sense of not making sense to make sense. At this stage of life, I think I kind of know what I want. I just have been struggling with the execution part. Therefore, I fail at life. Life is well if ya ask me. I have food, clothes, a roof, even a car, and a schedule. There's certainly other things that could make up the wellness of living, and that could be a bonus to my life. Most of the time, I feel like I don't deserve it. Sometimes I feel alone. Never did I get angry or mad at God for putting me in a position of uncertainty. Even though I didn't like what I've become the past 40 days or so, I'm constantly in prayer and repentance for my sins and for my shortness to be living for the God who made all.
The normal has vanished. The quietness and stillness of the ocean has gone tsunami. The works has creatively interesting and enticing to me lately. The people of the congregation has been more inviting and more welcoming. The family of myself hasn't been around much. The community, may I say, has been there for me as well. My peers are giving me lecture and telling me their lives and how magnificent they are. (Pardon me, if I tend to tell myself that I am John Ram the "magnificent") I wish God would give me peace. He has, and I am stubborn. I feel like the battle hasn't won on this earth. Jesus died and won the war on sin, I still have my missions to do on this earth. Let's see how that looks like.
The randomness of myself has gone viral. It's no illusion, no trick. The cerebrum may have been jumbled and rattled a lot lately. See, I like this girl. Just one. She's pretty. I'm a boy. I forgot to court. Impossible! Perhaps; however, it's not doing me any favors. I don't want any favors. I get crushed by my crush. I never thought where that came from. The Spirit is well. Broken, yes. I am. I'm not lost. If only she could read my mind. And God knows the desires of my heart and He definitely knows what's on my mind. Just rely that message to her. She has gone from human to power ranger. Its cold, yet I still am drawn to this person and still want to pursue and court. I know why. What I don't know is how..? The simple things in life should be simple. Maybe it's just in America. If I have to go catch 23 fishes before she gives me a smile, then I go to the waters for days to go fishing. Now, how would it look like if I decide to not fish. Well I get lost and hungry. And I was a little lost and hungry the past few weeks and days.
The confusion of this blog is meant to confuse you, whoever you are, reading. I'm not confuse. It's my life. I'm just shy, prideful, full of fear, and insecure. God loves me and created me to become unique and different. Yes, however, there are laws on this earth that are so created that makes me cringe. I don't want to follow the way of the world. I want to rule a kingdom that will be loving God and loving others. I know my role as a man. Am I hiding behind something? Yes. Everyone's hiding from something.
The moment when you wake up happy, and then you go to bed crying. Or vice versa. Completely possible to a one to one ratio. I have been having days of joys and sorrow. I really need God. And the devil's been good at taking over lately. From the business of life, to impressing others, to being selfish with my desires to please me first before God and others. Conviction strikes and I fall again the next day. The sadness is caused by low self esteem and missing a person who meant the whole glass of milk to the oreo. I poured out my heart and somewhat got things in rhythm. God has been in it to win it. Yet, there's still things that's stopping the fireworks to go off. I just look at the fireworks w/o having it to ignite it. I try igniting it and it won't just go off. I'm weak in that area. I worry too much. I think too much of the future. True story.
The time to end this for the month of April and say "it's gotta be May". Let's have a fresh start. Pay the bills, go serve, make brownies, watch movies and sports, and go have fun. I will do that. Whether it's just me or w/ bodies, it's just going to have to happen. Thank you for reading. :)
The self has stepped away for the month of April. In a sense of not making sense to make sense. At this stage of life, I think I kind of know what I want. I just have been struggling with the execution part. Therefore, I fail at life. Life is well if ya ask me. I have food, clothes, a roof, even a car, and a schedule. There's certainly other things that could make up the wellness of living, and that could be a bonus to my life. Most of the time, I feel like I don't deserve it. Sometimes I feel alone. Never did I get angry or mad at God for putting me in a position of uncertainty. Even though I didn't like what I've become the past 40 days or so, I'm constantly in prayer and repentance for my sins and for my shortness to be living for the God who made all.
The normal has vanished. The quietness and stillness of the ocean has gone tsunami. The works has creatively interesting and enticing to me lately. The people of the congregation has been more inviting and more welcoming. The family of myself hasn't been around much. The community, may I say, has been there for me as well. My peers are giving me lecture and telling me their lives and how magnificent they are. (Pardon me, if I tend to tell myself that I am John Ram the "magnificent") I wish God would give me peace. He has, and I am stubborn. I feel like the battle hasn't won on this earth. Jesus died and won the war on sin, I still have my missions to do on this earth. Let's see how that looks like.
The randomness of myself has gone viral. It's no illusion, no trick. The cerebrum may have been jumbled and rattled a lot lately. See, I like this girl. Just one. She's pretty. I'm a boy. I forgot to court. Impossible! Perhaps; however, it's not doing me any favors. I don't want any favors. I get crushed by my crush. I never thought where that came from. The Spirit is well. Broken, yes. I am. I'm not lost. If only she could read my mind. And God knows the desires of my heart and He definitely knows what's on my mind. Just rely that message to her. She has gone from human to power ranger. Its cold, yet I still am drawn to this person and still want to pursue and court. I know why. What I don't know is how..? The simple things in life should be simple. Maybe it's just in America. If I have to go catch 23 fishes before she gives me a smile, then I go to the waters for days to go fishing. Now, how would it look like if I decide to not fish. Well I get lost and hungry. And I was a little lost and hungry the past few weeks and days.
The confusion of this blog is meant to confuse you, whoever you are, reading. I'm not confuse. It's my life. I'm just shy, prideful, full of fear, and insecure. God loves me and created me to become unique and different. Yes, however, there are laws on this earth that are so created that makes me cringe. I don't want to follow the way of the world. I want to rule a kingdom that will be loving God and loving others. I know my role as a man. Am I hiding behind something? Yes. Everyone's hiding from something.
The moment when you wake up happy, and then you go to bed crying. Or vice versa. Completely possible to a one to one ratio. I have been having days of joys and sorrow. I really need God. And the devil's been good at taking over lately. From the business of life, to impressing others, to being selfish with my desires to please me first before God and others. Conviction strikes and I fall again the next day. The sadness is caused by low self esteem and missing a person who meant the whole glass of milk to the oreo. I poured out my heart and somewhat got things in rhythm. God has been in it to win it. Yet, there's still things that's stopping the fireworks to go off. I just look at the fireworks w/o having it to ignite it. I try igniting it and it won't just go off. I'm weak in that area. I worry too much. I think too much of the future. True story.
The time to end this for the month of April and say "it's gotta be May". Let's have a fresh start. Pay the bills, go serve, make brownies, watch movies and sports, and go have fun. I will do that. Whether it's just me or w/ bodies, it's just going to have to happen. Thank you for reading. :)
Sunday, March 11, 2012
Happy 28h Birthday to Me
It's one day of the year that everybody recognizes you. It's one day a year people sing songs for you with happy faces. It's one day a year when you are treated extra special. Remember your 1st birthday? I don't. I remember my childhood birthdays and I usually hide under my mother's skirt or go play outside w/ my friend who has no idea that it's my birthday.
I find my own birthday irrelevant. I find my life important; however, my birthday's just another day. Jesus celebrates his birthday on Christmas, but He actually wasn't born in December. I'd celebrate my baptism which is May 20th, that's when I was born again. I am born again. I was born March 11, 1984 as one who will be of this world. Then I am saved by the grace of God on May 20th 2008. I am blessed to know that my life is in Christ.
Today was odd. In a good and bad way. My mum & brother came to church with me. That was the highlight of my day. Even though with all the stress that my family bring me, for them to see and hear the environment that calms my weeks. God is working. I know this. I am optimistic that my mum will see God differently in a christian way. Constant prayer helps. "God, I pray that my mother will see that you are the only way, the truth, and the light". This world has corrupted a lot of minds and hearts. I want you God to help my family get through all the hardships and trials with life on this earth. I would love to spend eternity in heaven w/ my family. Of course it's not my will, but God's. It's my birthday and I thank God for my birth. I thank God for a chance to live in this beautiful creation, and to be surrounded with beautiful people to live with.
My goal today is to please God and be fulfilled with His Spirit. I knew that the devil would be in the way of that. My mum decides to bring up topics and certain things on the way to church and after church that just put me in a place of distress and anger. My mood wasn't going straight, and my day hasn't been happy. Fact that my mum and my bro was at church brought joy to me, but it also brought strangeness and awkwardness. I knew that's all worldly. Because of my pride, I lead them to church, but I wasn't completely there. I forgot my friends, I forgot those who wants to celebrate my birthday, I forgot the angel that baked me cupcakes. I totally messed up. I knew it. I know what I was doing. I was being dumb. I know better. I just wanted to cry out and ask God to turn back time. What's done is done. I have failed. I am missing. I have no excuses. I have tendencies of being a jerk. I have tendencies of being dramatic. I know. I'm working on it. I'll just swallow it all.
For the rest of the day, I decided to come out of my house and be with people. I am thankful for everybody. My only wish for my birthday is for everybody to realize that God is bigger than anything and everything. I want christians to live their life obedient to Chris all day, everyday. Not just on Sunday or a day during the week when they have a bible study. I don't even want to bother with world peace. I just want the world to LOVE GOD, and that comes peace. I don't know what else to say. I'm joyful. I want what makes you happy. It's never about me, it's always about Christ. I can call the shots if necessary, but at the end of the day it's all Christ's. What is pleasing to God, and what can be pleasing to my neighbors. I just want my wants is what my neighbor wants. The idea is crazy, but it's my birthday and I ask everybody to be Christ like. It's really a happy birthday to see everybody loving one another and loving God.
Thank you! Thank you! THank you!
I find my own birthday irrelevant. I find my life important; however, my birthday's just another day. Jesus celebrates his birthday on Christmas, but He actually wasn't born in December. I'd celebrate my baptism which is May 20th, that's when I was born again. I am born again. I was born March 11, 1984 as one who will be of this world. Then I am saved by the grace of God on May 20th 2008. I am blessed to know that my life is in Christ.
Today was odd. In a good and bad way. My mum & brother came to church with me. That was the highlight of my day. Even though with all the stress that my family bring me, for them to see and hear the environment that calms my weeks. God is working. I know this. I am optimistic that my mum will see God differently in a christian way. Constant prayer helps. "God, I pray that my mother will see that you are the only way, the truth, and the light". This world has corrupted a lot of minds and hearts. I want you God to help my family get through all the hardships and trials with life on this earth. I would love to spend eternity in heaven w/ my family. Of course it's not my will, but God's. It's my birthday and I thank God for my birth. I thank God for a chance to live in this beautiful creation, and to be surrounded with beautiful people to live with.
My goal today is to please God and be fulfilled with His Spirit. I knew that the devil would be in the way of that. My mum decides to bring up topics and certain things on the way to church and after church that just put me in a place of distress and anger. My mood wasn't going straight, and my day hasn't been happy. Fact that my mum and my bro was at church brought joy to me, but it also brought strangeness and awkwardness. I knew that's all worldly. Because of my pride, I lead them to church, but I wasn't completely there. I forgot my friends, I forgot those who wants to celebrate my birthday, I forgot the angel that baked me cupcakes. I totally messed up. I knew it. I know what I was doing. I was being dumb. I know better. I just wanted to cry out and ask God to turn back time. What's done is done. I have failed. I am missing. I have no excuses. I have tendencies of being a jerk. I have tendencies of being dramatic. I know. I'm working on it. I'll just swallow it all.
For the rest of the day, I decided to come out of my house and be with people. I am thankful for everybody. My only wish for my birthday is for everybody to realize that God is bigger than anything and everything. I want christians to live their life obedient to Chris all day, everyday. Not just on Sunday or a day during the week when they have a bible study. I don't even want to bother with world peace. I just want the world to LOVE GOD, and that comes peace. I don't know what else to say. I'm joyful. I want what makes you happy. It's never about me, it's always about Christ. I can call the shots if necessary, but at the end of the day it's all Christ's. What is pleasing to God, and what can be pleasing to my neighbors. I just want my wants is what my neighbor wants. The idea is crazy, but it's my birthday and I ask everybody to be Christ like. It's really a happy birthday to see everybody loving one another and loving God.
Thank you! Thank you! THank you!
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
29th and more soon...
Dear, ......
You are far beyond beautiful. God has made you in His image. I can't get over the fact that you are His precious creation and I get to live and love you forever. You are the 2nd best gift God has given me. Jesus is first. I can just keep ranting on how much you're gorgeous, and how much I adore you.
Honey! I love you! I thank you for your patience with me. I hope these letters make you happy. I know I'm a cheesy man, but what can I say. I jut love you!
Love, John
You are far beyond beautiful. God has made you in His image. I can't get over the fact that you are His precious creation and I get to live and love you forever. You are the 2nd best gift God has given me. Jesus is first. I can just keep ranting on how much you're gorgeous, and how much I adore you.
"Love knows no limit to its endurance
no end to its trus,
Love still stands
when all else has fallen"
-1 Corinthians 13:7-8
Honey! I love you! I thank you for your patience with me. I hope these letters make you happy. I know I'm a cheesy man, but what can I say. I jut love you!
Love, John
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
28th
Hello Love,
Hi. I'm in Denver, Colorado. Forgive me for this short message. I was here today to talk and meet with the people for this company that hired me here. I wanted more dollar bills on the salary that they were going to give me, since moving to Colorado would be a little bit of a hassle. We couldn't meet eye to eye with the numbers, and so we mutually decided to part ways. However, they'll keep me on the radar for future expansion and development. I want to tell you that I feel proud and honored that I got hired, but I felt like I needed some more time in Los Angeles to explore my options. Because there's a lot of options in LA. I just gotta go get them. I'm doing my best as a man to be ready to lead a family. I want you to be there with me and be helping each other to be raising heavenly babies. Ahhhh just the thought of it makes me giddy.
God is soo good. I'm blessed to be in a place of options and decisions that will change the future. I know I've got some studying and some learning to do, but these are fun things to go through. It leads to growth and experience. I want to be as wise as Solomon and as brave as David. I want to have the courage of manhood. I want to pursue you and love you to the fullest. I want to do it all with the power of the Holy Spirit of course. Galatians 5!!! Sooo good! I want to be full of the Spirit! Leggo!!
Please be nice! Please be the greatest partner in life! Please be everything that God has molded you to be! Continue to grow in Him and continue to love everybody! This is wonderful! Alrighty! Tomorrow's the last entry for you my love. I wish I can blow your mind with my words typed onto this blog. God will for sure blow our minds when that day happens! Good day!
Love, John
Hi. I'm in Denver, Colorado. Forgive me for this short message. I was here today to talk and meet with the people for this company that hired me here. I wanted more dollar bills on the salary that they were going to give me, since moving to Colorado would be a little bit of a hassle. We couldn't meet eye to eye with the numbers, and so we mutually decided to part ways. However, they'll keep me on the radar for future expansion and development. I want to tell you that I feel proud and honored that I got hired, but I felt like I needed some more time in Los Angeles to explore my options. Because there's a lot of options in LA. I just gotta go get them. I'm doing my best as a man to be ready to lead a family. I want you to be there with me and be helping each other to be raising heavenly babies. Ahhhh just the thought of it makes me giddy.
God is soo good. I'm blessed to be in a place of options and decisions that will change the future. I know I've got some studying and some learning to do, but these are fun things to go through. It leads to growth and experience. I want to be as wise as Solomon and as brave as David. I want to have the courage of manhood. I want to pursue you and love you to the fullest. I want to do it all with the power of the Holy Spirit of course. Galatians 5!!! Sooo good! I want to be full of the Spirit! Leggo!!
Please be nice! Please be the greatest partner in life! Please be everything that God has molded you to be! Continue to grow in Him and continue to love everybody! This is wonderful! Alrighty! Tomorrow's the last entry for you my love. I wish I can blow your mind with my words typed onto this blog. God will for sure blow our minds when that day happens! Good day!
Love, John
Monday, February 27, 2012
27th
My Love,
It's Monday! Happy Monday! I woke up this morning not knowing what to do. Like what am I doing today? I had a little bit of chest pains this morning. I won't die just yet. I will live to serve the Lord, and hopeful to live a life glorifying Him with you forever. I know it's becoming a theme of this month's blog entries to write about how much I want to serve God and how much I want to just live a life pleasing and being in love with Him first and then you second. I'm excited for tomorrow. There's a lot to be done, but with God's power in us. We're going to be able to do it all. I know it! You know it! God has it already written it down.
"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not harm you plans to give you hope and a future"- Jeremiah 29:11
Not taking this passage out of context; however, I believe that God has a plan. I have plan too, but His plan is a lot better. I doubt a lot, and often times I make mistakes. Actually, I make mistakes a lot in life. I choose the wrong words to say, I complicated relationships, and I'm just odd and strange to many. However, that's just who I am and I'm learning as I go through this life. I really hope that you get me and that you understand me more than I understand myself. I want to lead you, but also I want you to kick me in the butt if I have done something wrong or said something that's stupid. I love you, and would never want to intentionally harm or hurt you. Everything that I do is for the better and I'm going to live with that. I hope you believe the things that I say because I am what I say and I am what I do. Ultimately, I am a son of God. And hopefully a man that leads and guides you through this life that we're going to be sharing forever and ever.
Two more days before this month is over. There's an extra day left sort of like an encore to this project. I've been lazy and I know that I've delayed some of these entries. Especially these last ones. I'll leave it at that. I love you and will always will!
Love, John
It's Monday! Happy Monday! I woke up this morning not knowing what to do. Like what am I doing today? I had a little bit of chest pains this morning. I won't die just yet. I will live to serve the Lord, and hopeful to live a life glorifying Him with you forever. I know it's becoming a theme of this month's blog entries to write about how much I want to serve God and how much I want to just live a life pleasing and being in love with Him first and then you second. I'm excited for tomorrow. There's a lot to be done, but with God's power in us. We're going to be able to do it all. I know it! You know it! God has it already written it down.
"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not harm you plans to give you hope and a future"- Jeremiah 29:11
Not taking this passage out of context; however, I believe that God has a plan. I have plan too, but His plan is a lot better. I doubt a lot, and often times I make mistakes. Actually, I make mistakes a lot in life. I choose the wrong words to say, I complicated relationships, and I'm just odd and strange to many. However, that's just who I am and I'm learning as I go through this life. I really hope that you get me and that you understand me more than I understand myself. I want to lead you, but also I want you to kick me in the butt if I have done something wrong or said something that's stupid. I love you, and would never want to intentionally harm or hurt you. Everything that I do is for the better and I'm going to live with that. I hope you believe the things that I say because I am what I say and I am what I do. Ultimately, I am a son of God. And hopefully a man that leads and guides you through this life that we're going to be sharing forever and ever.
Two more days before this month is over. There's an extra day left sort of like an encore to this project. I've been lazy and I know that I've delayed some of these entries. Especially these last ones. I'll leave it at that. I love you and will always will!
Love, John
Sunday, February 26, 2012
26th
Lovely,
Hi! I failed on something. I'm behind on writing these to you. The business of life and the laziness of my own being has gotten back to me. I embraced this idea from the very beginning and it's hard for me to not know who you are. I pray for you daily. I pray for me daily. I pray for everybody daily. It's always broken. I start out writing to you after I do my devotions and then I could never finish. I shouldn't have any excuses. I'm a little bummed at myself. That's all.
Moving on to your loveliness! There's no doubt that you are lovely. You are so beautiful inside and out. I'm pretty sure you are. I am picky. Really. Often times I feel like I'll die alone. Only God knows what our future holds. I think it's well. I just have to be more positive. Like you are, whenever I look at you everything is alright. I want you to know that your beauty is beyond measure. My prayers right now is for God to keep a watch on you and for you to be blessed with goodness and happiness.
Everyday something is changing. Change is good. I'm definitely transforming and becoming more aware of what I'm dealing with and what I'm suppose to do in my life. This journey isn't easy, but I'm enjoying every bit of it. I hope you are becoming the woman that God has desired for you. And as we do so, our desire has, is and should be God. I want to you to know that in times of grayness and times of headaches that we are going to go through it together and I'll try to make this journey as comfortable as possible for you.
Three more days of writings to you.. I'm sure these letters won't be the end. My days are weird and my brain is always tired. I love you!
Sincerely, John
Hi! I failed on something. I'm behind on writing these to you. The business of life and the laziness of my own being has gotten back to me. I embraced this idea from the very beginning and it's hard for me to not know who you are. I pray for you daily. I pray for me daily. I pray for everybody daily. It's always broken. I start out writing to you after I do my devotions and then I could never finish. I shouldn't have any excuses. I'm a little bummed at myself. That's all.
Moving on to your loveliness! There's no doubt that you are lovely. You are so beautiful inside and out. I'm pretty sure you are. I am picky. Really. Often times I feel like I'll die alone. Only God knows what our future holds. I think it's well. I just have to be more positive. Like you are, whenever I look at you everything is alright. I want you to know that your beauty is beyond measure. My prayers right now is for God to keep a watch on you and for you to be blessed with goodness and happiness.
Everyday something is changing. Change is good. I'm definitely transforming and becoming more aware of what I'm dealing with and what I'm suppose to do in my life. This journey isn't easy, but I'm enjoying every bit of it. I hope you are becoming the woman that God has desired for you. And as we do so, our desire has, is and should be God. I want to you to know that in times of grayness and times of headaches that we are going to go through it together and I'll try to make this journey as comfortable as possible for you.
Three more days of writings to you.. I'm sure these letters won't be the end. My days are weird and my brain is always tired. I love you!
Sincerely, John
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Twenty Fifth
Hi <3
You probably know by now how much I love God. The way of life should be done in love. I am trying to the max to keep that in mind (1st Corinthians 16:14). I miss you. I know. Weird. It's Sunday and I went to a family lunch thing where I had to really be in prayer and be patient with family. I'm fine w/ my mom, sister, and brother. However, my extended family is a little out of control. My cousins are brats, and the elders are foreign. I'm foreign, I'm also diverse. They're one sided folks who only sticks with what they know and what the world gives to them. I can't really speak up because of plenty of reasons. I don't want to disrespect them. I'm just going to love who they are. I literally was in prayer the whole time. It was great. My patience was being tested. I survived. It wasn't a perfect lunch, but I'm glad that I went. My grama keeps tearing up every time she sees me. :)
I know that was a long rant. I hope that by the time that you read this, you've met my family. I hope you understand why I say these things. I also will guess that you love my family. A little weird, but yea. We'll see. I want to to be a son to your mom and dad. I want to be a brother to your siblings if you have any. I'm confident that your family will appreciate me for who I am. They will probably love me more than you. I'm just joking. I will adapt easily to your family. Whether you like it or not. Family is important to me. And I'm reconstructing my own right now. I don't know if it'll ever be that perfect picture of a family, but it is what it is.
I'm going to church tonight. I ate too much food. It's always a good and bad feeling. That feeling of all that food in me makes me glad, but I know I have to work it all out later. It's okay. I've never been so motivated to work out. Although, I have many injuries and I'm also getting older. However, my mind is still willing to go beyond what my body can't. I know this because I can push myself to a point of lactic acid building up to my entire body. It's okay. I'm moderately happy with my work outs. I'm not too obsess about it. I'm just keeping a healthy living. The real joy is in praising and worshiping our God. Oh man... I can't wait to do that tonight!
I love you. I want to do things along side with you. I want to go on an adventure with you. Leggo!
<3, John
You probably know by now how much I love God. The way of life should be done in love. I am trying to the max to keep that in mind (1st Corinthians 16:14). I miss you. I know. Weird. It's Sunday and I went to a family lunch thing where I had to really be in prayer and be patient with family. I'm fine w/ my mom, sister, and brother. However, my extended family is a little out of control. My cousins are brats, and the elders are foreign. I'm foreign, I'm also diverse. They're one sided folks who only sticks with what they know and what the world gives to them. I can't really speak up because of plenty of reasons. I don't want to disrespect them. I'm just going to love who they are. I literally was in prayer the whole time. It was great. My patience was being tested. I survived. It wasn't a perfect lunch, but I'm glad that I went. My grama keeps tearing up every time she sees me. :)
I know that was a long rant. I hope that by the time that you read this, you've met my family. I hope you understand why I say these things. I also will guess that you love my family. A little weird, but yea. We'll see. I want to to be a son to your mom and dad. I want to be a brother to your siblings if you have any. I'm confident that your family will appreciate me for who I am. They will probably love me more than you. I'm just joking. I will adapt easily to your family. Whether you like it or not. Family is important to me. And I'm reconstructing my own right now. I don't know if it'll ever be that perfect picture of a family, but it is what it is.
I'm going to church tonight. I ate too much food. It's always a good and bad feeling. That feeling of all that food in me makes me glad, but I know I have to work it all out later. It's okay. I've never been so motivated to work out. Although, I have many injuries and I'm also getting older. However, my mind is still willing to go beyond what my body can't. I know this because I can push myself to a point of lactic acid building up to my entire body. It's okay. I'm moderately happy with my work outs. I'm not too obsess about it. I'm just keeping a healthy living. The real joy is in praising and worshiping our God. Oh man... I can't wait to do that tonight!
I love you. I want to do things along side with you. I want to go on an adventure with you. Leggo!
<3, John
Friday, February 24, 2012
Twenty Fourth
Babe,
It has been a long and dreadful week. I'm a bit excited that it's the weekend. Lots of exciting things happening. I'm so happy right now! I finished most of the main things that I have to do this week. I also heard back from a company in Denver and they want me to work for them. However, that means that I have to move there. They're flying me out there next week to sit down and talk. We will see how this goes.
There's a lot of joy in my heart right now. I don't even know where to begin. I'm writing to you right now and listening to needtobreathe. Yes! They're awesome! I bought tickets to go see them at the end of March. I love concerts. I used to go to so many before. I could still go to a lot of them, but some of them are expensive. I'm becoming more responsible of my moneys.
Speaking of moneys and finances. I want you to know that I will do whatever it takes to provide and take care of you. God will provide. He won't let us starve. I won't let that happen either. I'd sacrifice my desires over you anytime. I want us to be stable and established wherever we are before we start thinking about the glamorous things that I'm sure you'll be dreaming of. It's okay to dream. My dreams are just for that joy to reach our hearts and that satisfaction that all we need in this worldly life is Jesus.
I love you. I will love you forever. I love you now even w/o knowing of you.
Sincerely, John
It has been a long and dreadful week. I'm a bit excited that it's the weekend. Lots of exciting things happening. I'm so happy right now! I finished most of the main things that I have to do this week. I also heard back from a company in Denver and they want me to work for them. However, that means that I have to move there. They're flying me out there next week to sit down and talk. We will see how this goes.
There's a lot of joy in my heart right now. I don't even know where to begin. I'm writing to you right now and listening to needtobreathe. Yes! They're awesome! I bought tickets to go see them at the end of March. I love concerts. I used to go to so many before. I could still go to a lot of them, but some of them are expensive. I'm becoming more responsible of my moneys.
Speaking of moneys and finances. I want you to know that I will do whatever it takes to provide and take care of you. God will provide. He won't let us starve. I won't let that happen either. I'd sacrifice my desires over you anytime. I want us to be stable and established wherever we are before we start thinking about the glamorous things that I'm sure you'll be dreaming of. It's okay to dream. My dreams are just for that joy to reach our hearts and that satisfaction that all we need in this worldly life is Jesus.
I love you. I will love you forever. I love you now even w/o knowing of you.
Sincerely, John
Thursday, February 23, 2012
23rd
Dearly Beloved,
I'm just going to say that I miss you. I miss you even though I don't know if you exist or not. I want to start out by saying that there will be time in the future that we will be apart for a day or more because of our busy lives. I love you. I don't ever want to be separated from you, but it's good to have out own lives too. I have my business and you have yours. We come home to each other wanting to tell how our days went. We wake up every morning wishing the best day for each other.
Last night's teaching at the college group was a grand success. I'm glad that's accomplished. I was a little stressed and hyped about it. Thank God, literally for being with me the whole time. I want to be working more for God. To have Him as the root of everything that I do. Whether it's research, cleaning, cooking, courting my love, etc. The topic of angels & demons has been handed to the college students of LMU. And the love of Jesus Christ is with them. Yes! Soooo Goood!
Honesty shouldn't be a problem, but often times I'm too honest. I hope you understand me. Honey bunny!! I say the dumbest things sometimes. I want to just duct tape my mouth sometimes. I say stupid things that could hurt people, or just plain and simple hurt me. I really don't want to see people in a place of discomfort and unhappiness. It's okay to be sad. I'm sad a lot. I hope not as much when you come into my life. You are my sunshine! The one that's brighter than the sun! I want to be honest to you as much as possible. I want to open up to you and bring up stuff that bothers me. I hope you do the same with me. Communication is key for this relationship to work. I don't want to be passive at all, not just with you, but with everybody else. God knows my heart. Literally. You probably know it by now.
Before I end this entry. I would like to tell you that I will be as honest as possible with you. And we're going to be arguing and maybe even fighting, but the love that I have for you is stronger than the waves of the pacific. God wins. We both live to love Him. With that comes our love for each other.
Love, John
I'm just going to say that I miss you. I miss you even though I don't know if you exist or not. I want to start out by saying that there will be time in the future that we will be apart for a day or more because of our busy lives. I love you. I don't ever want to be separated from you, but it's good to have out own lives too. I have my business and you have yours. We come home to each other wanting to tell how our days went. We wake up every morning wishing the best day for each other.
Last night's teaching at the college group was a grand success. I'm glad that's accomplished. I was a little stressed and hyped about it. Thank God, literally for being with me the whole time. I want to be working more for God. To have Him as the root of everything that I do. Whether it's research, cleaning, cooking, courting my love, etc. The topic of angels & demons has been handed to the college students of LMU. And the love of Jesus Christ is with them. Yes! Soooo Goood!
Honesty shouldn't be a problem, but often times I'm too honest. I hope you understand me. Honey bunny!! I say the dumbest things sometimes. I want to just duct tape my mouth sometimes. I say stupid things that could hurt people, or just plain and simple hurt me. I really don't want to see people in a place of discomfort and unhappiness. It's okay to be sad. I'm sad a lot. I hope not as much when you come into my life. You are my sunshine! The one that's brighter than the sun! I want to be honest to you as much as possible. I want to open up to you and bring up stuff that bothers me. I hope you do the same with me. Communication is key for this relationship to work. I don't want to be passive at all, not just with you, but with everybody else. God knows my heart. Literally. You probably know it by now.
Before I end this entry. I would like to tell you that I will be as honest as possible with you. And we're going to be arguing and maybe even fighting, but the love that I have for you is stronger than the waves of the pacific. God wins. We both live to love Him. With that comes our love for each other.
Love, John
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
22nd
My Queen,
Once I get over this day, I'd be in a little bit of relief. I'm working so hard preparing a sermon for the college group about angels and demons. I feel like I was actually attacked by a demon last night with my dream. There was fire, and a new born baby was coming to this earth. It wasn't like a cute baby, but it was creepy baby. Anyhow, I love you. I'm not going to keep going with this dream because I got to focus on the prize, that's Jesus Christ.
I really enjoy leading a bible study or teaching people about God's story. We're all different stories. The bible is just so amazing! I want to read it with you, my queen. I want to read it to you every night before we go to bed. I want to memorize the book of Song of Solomon because you glorify God with your body. A little too much, ok sorry.
I'm doing some research on make up right now. There's mercury in some of them and causes women to have mercury poisoning. Not good. You don't need make up to look beautiful. I love you in any state you are. I'm also trying to develop a better method to test super buff Staph. It's complicated. I'm just recording what I'm doing, who knows I could have some break through on this one. I need a break at work. I've been applying for jobs around the country. I hope you like to travel. :)
I'm a little behind on my letters to you. I apologize. Lent started today. Everyone's going nuts. I'm just excited to live a life of joy, hope, faith, and love. I love you my Queen.
xoxox, John
Once I get over this day, I'd be in a little bit of relief. I'm working so hard preparing a sermon for the college group about angels and demons. I feel like I was actually attacked by a demon last night with my dream. There was fire, and a new born baby was coming to this earth. It wasn't like a cute baby, but it was creepy baby. Anyhow, I love you. I'm not going to keep going with this dream because I got to focus on the prize, that's Jesus Christ.
I really enjoy leading a bible study or teaching people about God's story. We're all different stories. The bible is just so amazing! I want to read it with you, my queen. I want to read it to you every night before we go to bed. I want to memorize the book of Song of Solomon because you glorify God with your body. A little too much, ok sorry.
I'm doing some research on make up right now. There's mercury in some of them and causes women to have mercury poisoning. Not good. You don't need make up to look beautiful. I love you in any state you are. I'm also trying to develop a better method to test super buff Staph. It's complicated. I'm just recording what I'm doing, who knows I could have some break through on this one. I need a break at work. I've been applying for jobs around the country. I hope you like to travel. :)
I'm a little behind on my letters to you. I apologize. Lent started today. Everyone's going nuts. I'm just excited to live a life of joy, hope, faith, and love. I love you my Queen.
xoxox, John
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
21st
Beautiful,
Hello! You are beautiful! Fact: you are attractive. Yes. Your heart is also at the right place with God. I just want to serve alongside with you all day everyday. There will be days in the future where there will be silence between us and just smiles. Knowing and understanding each other w/o saying anything. You are my favorite person! I want to be happy with you. I want to be sad with you. Just promise me that we can keep each other in check with our walk with God. I tend to be good at saying something simple with a negative connotation. I'm trying to be more positive and happier. My heart can only handle so much.
Anyways, this week's like the "grumpy" week. I don't even know where to begin. From projects, sermons, reports, chores, meetings, applications, interviews, re-certs, etc. I am in no mood to be playing around. I do; however, find time to spend time w/ JC, and just have joy and peace with everything. I just listen to some good tunes, eat some good foods, hang with some good peeps, go see some scenes, and use some of my time wisely. I am blessed! I'd take unending joy, than temporary happiness. You are my joy, and you make me happy the most! :)
John, xoxoxo
Hello! You are beautiful! Fact: you are attractive. Yes. Your heart is also at the right place with God. I just want to serve alongside with you all day everyday. There will be days in the future where there will be silence between us and just smiles. Knowing and understanding each other w/o saying anything. You are my favorite person! I want to be happy with you. I want to be sad with you. Just promise me that we can keep each other in check with our walk with God. I tend to be good at saying something simple with a negative connotation. I'm trying to be more positive and happier. My heart can only handle so much.
Anyways, this week's like the "grumpy" week. I don't even know where to begin. From projects, sermons, reports, chores, meetings, applications, interviews, re-certs, etc. I am in no mood to be playing around. I do; however, find time to spend time w/ JC, and just have joy and peace with everything. I just listen to some good tunes, eat some good foods, hang with some good peeps, go see some scenes, and use some of my time wisely. I am blessed! I'd take unending joy, than temporary happiness. You are my joy, and you make me happy the most! :)
John, xoxoxo
Monday, February 20, 2012
20th
Dear,
It is President's day. I am at work. I'm writing to you! Because you are special. I just have to finish this project. I'm analyzing blood now. It's interesting. However, I want to go out and play. It's so nice out.
I will marry you because you're the first person that I want to look at when I wake up in the morning. You're the only one that I want to kiss goodnight. Because first time that I saw your hands I couldn't imagine not being able to hold them. Mainly, when you love someone as much as I do getting married is the only thing left to do.
This one's a short one. I have dindin plans tonight w/ a friend. That's it.
xo
It is President's day. I am at work. I'm writing to you! Because you are special. I just have to finish this project. I'm analyzing blood now. It's interesting. However, I want to go out and play. It's so nice out.
I will marry you because you're the first person that I want to look at when I wake up in the morning. You're the only one that I want to kiss goodnight. Because first time that I saw your hands I couldn't imagine not being able to hold them. Mainly, when you love someone as much as I do getting married is the only thing left to do.
This one's a short one. I have dindin plans tonight w/ a friend. That's it.
xo
Sunday, February 19, 2012
Nineteenth
Partner!
I can barely move... I played 4 hours of basketball last night and walk around the pier. I actually had a fabulous time watching the night life and eating froyo and playing scrabble. I stood out and even got smiles from the opposite sex. I don't know why, I'm charming I guess. It was fun. I hope you understand that you're with someone that the girls love. I'm just praying that you are more in love with God than you are in love with me. I'm single right now, and my desire is God. My identity is in Christ. I love what I do, I love all my ministries, I love serving, I love being a busy body, I love being social, I love myself. Overall, my first love is Christ. And I want my love for Jesus be beaming to others wherever, whatever I'm doing. A night of basketball, the Counter, oranges/bananas from vons, pier, fro yo, night hike. Epic!
I went to the young professional's group today at the church. I just realize that it's my first time there this year. I've been a part of that group for years now, and it felt weird seeing all the new faces that was in there. I was there for a reason. A great friend's sharing about her mission work. Always awesome! Sunday's are fun and eventful. Fund raiser at Panda Express and then I met a new friend. Played bocchi ball at the park, as I gimped around the green grass. I keep hurting myself by doing too much. Its okay. I know I'll heal. My heart's been ok, I guess. I've been taking them pills, it's expensive, but I decided to take some for 10 days since last week. I had too, there was a lot I was dealing with. I'll tell you more about it later.
Anyways, I've been looking at vacation trips and stuff. I want to travel with you. I am saving moneys for the future and for you. I don't quite know where you are and how you are and when you are coming in my life. Perhaps you already are and we're just both blind. At this point of my life, I'm just working on becoming a better man, so you better be working on becoming a better woman of God. I am just in awe of how God is so amazing and wonderful! Thank you!
Church was AMAZING tonight! I am so thankful for my home church. I can't thank God enough for the pastors, the elders, the leaders, and the congregation for everything. Things are well when I focus my heart and mind on Christ. So gooooood! Afterwards was dude's night. Oh man, I desperately needed this one. We haven't had a dude's night in a while. So many good talks. Great fellowship and just bro love. I'm sure you'll understand my need of dudes nights or dudes day, since you're probably going to have girl time w/ the girls. And that's the beautiful. Alright, I'm sleepy. I pray that you are well and fine when you read this in the future.
Love, John xo
I can barely move... I played 4 hours of basketball last night and walk around the pier. I actually had a fabulous time watching the night life and eating froyo and playing scrabble. I stood out and even got smiles from the opposite sex. I don't know why, I'm charming I guess. It was fun. I hope you understand that you're with someone that the girls love. I'm just praying that you are more in love with God than you are in love with me. I'm single right now, and my desire is God. My identity is in Christ. I love what I do, I love all my ministries, I love serving, I love being a busy body, I love being social, I love myself. Overall, my first love is Christ. And I want my love for Jesus be beaming to others wherever, whatever I'm doing. A night of basketball, the Counter, oranges/bananas from vons, pier, fro yo, night hike. Epic!
I went to the young professional's group today at the church. I just realize that it's my first time there this year. I've been a part of that group for years now, and it felt weird seeing all the new faces that was in there. I was there for a reason. A great friend's sharing about her mission work. Always awesome! Sunday's are fun and eventful. Fund raiser at Panda Express and then I met a new friend. Played bocchi ball at the park, as I gimped around the green grass. I keep hurting myself by doing too much. Its okay. I know I'll heal. My heart's been ok, I guess. I've been taking them pills, it's expensive, but I decided to take some for 10 days since last week. I had too, there was a lot I was dealing with. I'll tell you more about it later.
Anyways, I've been looking at vacation trips and stuff. I want to travel with you. I am saving moneys for the future and for you. I don't quite know where you are and how you are and when you are coming in my life. Perhaps you already are and we're just both blind. At this point of my life, I'm just working on becoming a better man, so you better be working on becoming a better woman of God. I am just in awe of how God is so amazing and wonderful! Thank you!
Church was AMAZING tonight! I am so thankful for my home church. I can't thank God enough for the pastors, the elders, the leaders, and the congregation for everything. Things are well when I focus my heart and mind on Christ. So gooooood! Afterwards was dude's night. Oh man, I desperately needed this one. We haven't had a dude's night in a while. So many good talks. Great fellowship and just bro love. I'm sure you'll understand my need of dudes nights or dudes day, since you're probably going to have girl time w/ the girls. And that's the beautiful. Alright, I'm sleepy. I pray that you are well and fine when you read this in the future.
Love, John xo
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Eighteenth
Hello!
Saturday morning! Yay!!! I made pancakes, bacon, and some banana shake. Saturday mornings are probably one of my favorite times of the week. Just to be able to do devotions and spend time in prayer assessing the week. I love it! I love you! I pray for you daily. I don't even know if you exist or not. I feel like a weirdo for doing this project, really. It's romantic, yet it sounds psychotic. Well that's that.
The past few days have been rough. I am glad that it's Saturday though. I got to focus on finishing some home projects and probably would add a time to work out later. The boys are thinking about going and playing basketball. Suppose to go on a night hike tonight. All these activities makes me happy. I pray that our life together will have unlimited activities and fun. It's going to be grand.
My love, this is it for now. I have lots to do today and my busyness right now is for us in the future.
John
Saturday morning! Yay!!! I made pancakes, bacon, and some banana shake. Saturday mornings are probably one of my favorite times of the week. Just to be able to do devotions and spend time in prayer assessing the week. I love it! I love you! I pray for you daily. I don't even know if you exist or not. I feel like a weirdo for doing this project, really. It's romantic, yet it sounds psychotic. Well that's that.
The past few days have been rough. I am glad that it's Saturday though. I got to focus on finishing some home projects and probably would add a time to work out later. The boys are thinking about going and playing basketball. Suppose to go on a night hike tonight. All these activities makes me happy. I pray that our life together will have unlimited activities and fun. It's going to be grand.
My love, this is it for now. I have lots to do today and my busyness right now is for us in the future.
John
Friday, February 17, 2012
17th
Hey Babe,
How would I describe this day? Uncertain. I'm excited for the weekend. I am tired. There's a lot going thru my head, but it's pretty clear that God is ruling over everything. I'm sure you are excited for our God too. The one that is who gave us life, and now this life is what makes us love one another and praise and worship our King! So good!
I love you! It's Friday! It's afternoon. I'm not quite sure what I want to do tonight. There's always options. A run to go get deedeereese is very tempting. I like food. I also like to work out hard. I'm not so much obsess about it; however, I am enjoying every bite and lap that I do. I don't think I'll ever be a couch potato. This world's got so much to offer: good and bad. One step at a time and I'm going to be spending eternity in heaven.
This week's been strangely difficult. Also sunny! With the funky clouds and rain over the ocean. I come to realize that no matter the weather is in our lives that the sun will shine. I want to do something different tonight. Spontaneity and variety is great. I try not to seek the luxury of the world/culture, so I try to own my activities, adventures, and style doing so. I am weird. You're beautiful! That's why we work well together. :)
I have been writing entries, but never get to finish them. So I apologize, and that's a little bit of a confession. I'm just calling myself out on here. I don't want to be dishonest by telling you that I worked so hard to write you these letters daily back in February of 2012. I just want you to know that I love you, and that I thank God for bringing you into my life. We rock!
Love, John
How would I describe this day? Uncertain. I'm excited for the weekend. I am tired. There's a lot going thru my head, but it's pretty clear that God is ruling over everything. I'm sure you are excited for our God too. The one that is who gave us life, and now this life is what makes us love one another and praise and worship our King! So good!
I love you! It's Friday! It's afternoon. I'm not quite sure what I want to do tonight. There's always options. A run to go get deedeereese is very tempting. I like food. I also like to work out hard. I'm not so much obsess about it; however, I am enjoying every bite and lap that I do. I don't think I'll ever be a couch potato. This world's got so much to offer: good and bad. One step at a time and I'm going to be spending eternity in heaven.
This week's been strangely difficult. Also sunny! With the funky clouds and rain over the ocean. I come to realize that no matter the weather is in our lives that the sun will shine. I want to do something different tonight. Spontaneity and variety is great. I try not to seek the luxury of the world/culture, so I try to own my activities, adventures, and style doing so. I am weird. You're beautiful! That's why we work well together. :)
I have been writing entries, but never get to finish them. So I apologize, and that's a little bit of a confession. I'm just calling myself out on here. I don't want to be dishonest by telling you that I worked so hard to write you these letters daily back in February of 2012. I just want you to know that I love you, and that I thank God for bringing you into my life. We rock!
Love, John
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Sixteenth
Babe,
I can't wait to come home to you and just tell you how my day went and just talk. I was out of sync today. I just keep forgetting things. Even with my to-do list, I'm just not all there today. Yesterday's problems still bother me a little bit. I've given it all to God. And as much as I don't want to bring Him up, God's my only hope. I am losing it. I would be doing ungodly things right now. Just having that thought makes me grinch. I am sinning for feeling this way. It's annoying. I don't want to feel like this. I'm just lonely. Man, I love God, so much that I am willing to lose it all. If you, my love, have to walk away from me... I'm not sure what I'd do. I know that I shouldn't be attaching myself to this world, I'm here to fellowship with other Christians and share God's love and truth to those who aren't save. I am in this conundrum. I want those men and women who knows God to grow closer to Him, not be just on the surface. I crave for more. I just want to see people liberated of this world and what it's been telling us. I am on my knees almost everyday just crying out to God. Take away my desires of this world.
We're a team. You and me. Team Ram! Yeeee! You are always on my prayers. We can be on our knees together praying to our God. That would be a dream come true for me. I'm excited for what's ahead. I'm blocking my negative emotions right now with constant prayer, exercise, and talking to my dog Iggy. I'm also keeping myself busy making the moneys to start saving up for your shopping money. Hopefully, you're not too crazy over material stuff. We'll live comfortable with some style and spank. I'll leave it at that.
Love, John
I can't wait to come home to you and just tell you how my day went and just talk. I was out of sync today. I just keep forgetting things. Even with my to-do list, I'm just not all there today. Yesterday's problems still bother me a little bit. I've given it all to God. And as much as I don't want to bring Him up, God's my only hope. I am losing it. I would be doing ungodly things right now. Just having that thought makes me grinch. I am sinning for feeling this way. It's annoying. I don't want to feel like this. I'm just lonely. Man, I love God, so much that I am willing to lose it all. If you, my love, have to walk away from me... I'm not sure what I'd do. I know that I shouldn't be attaching myself to this world, I'm here to fellowship with other Christians and share God's love and truth to those who aren't save. I am in this conundrum. I want those men and women who knows God to grow closer to Him, not be just on the surface. I crave for more. I just want to see people liberated of this world and what it's been telling us. I am on my knees almost everyday just crying out to God. Take away my desires of this world.
We're a team. You and me. Team Ram! Yeeee! You are always on my prayers. We can be on our knees together praying to our God. That would be a dream come true for me. I'm excited for what's ahead. I'm blocking my negative emotions right now with constant prayer, exercise, and talking to my dog Iggy. I'm also keeping myself busy making the moneys to start saving up for your shopping money. Hopefully, you're not too crazy over material stuff. We'll live comfortable with some style and spank. I'll leave it at that.
Love, John
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
15th
Hi
We're at the middle point of this project. I am lonely. Life's great, today started really well for me and then there was a moment this afternoon when I felt like my heart stopped for a good hour. I do not like weeping. Life's full of trials. I know this for a fact. I work hard to capture the flag just to know that the flag is not there. Story of my life: become uber passionate about something, and my passion would turn back to me and say you may no longer continue. It's frustrating. I have to be honest that I wasn't happy with God. I wasn't using Him to get what I want. My intentions was to do His commandments. My emotions got to me and won. The world has won me over, again. I am imperfect and with that comes a lot of sin. I have to stories: one good, and one bad. I'll start w/ the ache inside of me.
Honey. I love you. I love Jesus too. I want to share Jesus to you everyday. I want to share Jesus to everyone everyday, to you especially. I'm in a position right now where I want to get settled. I'm all over the place at the moment. There is truth to this. I have a lot going on and I'm to balance it. Key word there was "I". God's the center of all of these. Even when my heart feels like it shreds a layer each day. I'm still going to be loving on our God. I can only love people so much. And I must learn to respect them when they say "no" to an act of service. Which is a love language. It's the worse feeling to be so engaged in something so important to me and someone else would have more of an authority to veto something that doesn't even hurt or affect them in a negative way. It affects me more, perhaps because I let this world got to me and my desire for something overcame my desire for God. So as I'm writing this. I'm confined with that idea. I'm not keen on changing people. All I do is influence others in a way in which Jesus' influence me. However, I am only human. I can be stubborn and arrogant. I'm persistent and pushy sometimes. I'm not acting in violence or in hatred. I just become very sad and aggravated when the red light come on and perhaps it was too late for me to hit the breaks and my front tires pass the white line and I get a ticket that cost more than the grammy's production and I have to finish 29990 hours of traffic school. Life's never fair, and I know that. I love you, and I am just thankful daily that you're here for me.
To the good portion of my day. I read and meditated this morning by the beach on a cloudy day. The picture above was taken by my friend who was there while I was. I was waiting to meet someone special today and spend some good quality time catching up. Just had an amazing time watching God move the ocean and the clouds, not to mention the beauty inside and out of my friend. Things were great. I woke up early, worked for a bit, and got some great conversations that only happens in rare occasions. I'm learning every minute of my life. My brain needs to stop thinking, and my heart needs to stop loving the idea of loving. I am weird, and I know this. I'm okay with that. I know that you're okay with that.
Thanks for listening, John
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
14th
My Valentine,
I love you! I don't want to make this super crazy special. You know that everyday, in our life together, from now on, is going to be a valentines day. If I may, I would want to have fresh flowers every morning and fresh fruits for breakfast for you. I would pick them all out from our garden. I will be dedicated to this even on my off days. You are the sun to my life, the source of my energy. The one who cares, and makes me happy because you're so pretty.
Happy Valentines Day! I want you to know that I love you forever and that my love for you will never leave. The devil can not separate us. He can try. He won't win. God is with us. We are going to keep our love for God forever, and our love for each other until we die. It's going to be a wild and crazy ride. I'm in it for you to win it.
We are going to keep His commandments. We are going to keep our vows until the end. I am excited for our many Valentines together. I'm going to keep this short since time is against me at the moment. You are loved so much by yours truly. I just want to give you everything that is me.
<3 John
I love you! I don't want to make this super crazy special. You know that everyday, in our life together, from now on, is going to be a valentines day. If I may, I would want to have fresh flowers every morning and fresh fruits for breakfast for you. I would pick them all out from our garden. I will be dedicated to this even on my off days. You are the sun to my life, the source of my energy. The one who cares, and makes me happy because you're so pretty.
Happy Valentines Day! I want you to know that I love you forever and that my love for you will never leave. The devil can not separate us. He can try. He won't win. God is with us. We are going to keep our love for God forever, and our love for each other until we die. It's going to be a wild and crazy ride. I'm in it for you to win it.
We are going to keep His commandments. We are going to keep our vows until the end. I am excited for our many Valentines together. I'm going to keep this short since time is against me at the moment. You are loved so much by yours truly. I just want to give you everything that is me.
John 14:21-24 Whoever has my commandments and keeps them, he it is who loves me. And he who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I will love him and manifest myself to him.” Judas (not Iscariot) said to him, “Lord, how is it that you will manifest yourself to us, and not to the world?” Jesus answered him, “If anyone loves me, he will keep my word, and my Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him. Whoever does not love me does not keep my words. And the word that you hear is not mine but the Father’s who sent me.
<3 John
Monday, February 13, 2012
13th
Huny Bunny!
Hello! Tomorrow's Vday. I have a big date with my mom. I'm semi excited since I haven't taken her out in a while. I'm taking her out to Admiral Risty. It should be good. Today's been great. I woke up rode my bike to work. I got an email saying that this company aerotek wants to do a second interview on the phone this Wednesday. We'll see how it goes. So I was reading the word this morning and thought about how it's Valentines week and all. I just wanted to share this verse and just really meditate on it.
Oh boy! We are one. You and me, together. We are going to love the Lord our God with all our heart, and with all our soul, and with all our mind and with all our strength. You and I will be together with God. That's the plan.
I check out the dates for the GRE's and MCAT's today to see what would work out for me. I need to register soon and I'm trying to get a more realistic time when I can be ready to take either one. I also talked to my chief today about school, work, mission, and the future. She told me that I'm great, and that I'll excel tremendously at whatever I decide to do. And that I should get my ms, or doctorate, so that I can take over her job as the head of the research and development emphasis in pathology at the hospital. We're not really close and we don't talk much, I just exchange notes and email each other a lot. So for her to tell me these things is pretty rockin. I want to make you proud hunny bun! I'm doing my best of being joyful in the Lord while dealing with microscopes, lab reports, and cells.
confession time... I had to pause and come back tonight to finish this entry. I didn't had a window to sit down and type you a love letter today. I love you!
Love, John
Hello! Tomorrow's Vday. I have a big date with my mom. I'm semi excited since I haven't taken her out in a while. I'm taking her out to Admiral Risty. It should be good. Today's been great. I woke up rode my bike to work. I got an email saying that this company aerotek wants to do a second interview on the phone this Wednesday. We'll see how it goes. So I was reading the word this morning and thought about how it's Valentines week and all. I just wanted to share this verse and just really meditate on it.
Mark 12:28-30 And one of the scribes came up and heard them disputing with one another, and seeing that he answered them well, asked him, “Which commandment is the most important of all?” Jesus answered, “The most important is, ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’
Oh boy! We are one. You and me, together. We are going to love the Lord our God with all our heart, and with all our soul, and with all our mind and with all our strength. You and I will be together with God. That's the plan.
I check out the dates for the GRE's and MCAT's today to see what would work out for me. I need to register soon and I'm trying to get a more realistic time when I can be ready to take either one. I also talked to my chief today about school, work, mission, and the future. She told me that I'm great, and that I'll excel tremendously at whatever I decide to do. And that I should get my ms, or doctorate, so that I can take over her job as the head of the research and development emphasis in pathology at the hospital. We're not really close and we don't talk much, I just exchange notes and email each other a lot. So for her to tell me these things is pretty rockin. I want to make you proud hunny bun! I'm doing my best of being joyful in the Lord while dealing with microscopes, lab reports, and cells.
confession time... I had to pause and come back tonight to finish this entry. I didn't had a window to sit down and type you a love letter today. I love you!
Love, John
Sunday, February 12, 2012
12th
Sweet Honey Pie!
Hi! I don't know where to begin. Whitney Houston died. So sad... I want to quote her right now: And I will alwayssss LOVEEEE YOU!! It's also the grammy's tonight. So there's a lot happening. Church is always exciting! I love our God! I cried a little bit at church today. I just need God. That's it. I don't even know if you exist. I know God exist. That's all I need. I love Him so much. He keeps me going. And hopefully to you, one day. I almost couldn't be able to write to you today. That would be sad. There's been a lot going on. I won't make an excuse. I'm writing now.
Trying to do my finances today. I also tried to assess my options for the future. I really want a house. Where we can start a family. I love you! I'm applying to a handful of school to continue my education. Also seeking a new career path. So that I can thyde more give you more shopping money. Then this verse came to my mind.
I'm not worried. I tend to be anxious. I'm actually more excited. I won't be alone. I have you. We can do this. I will provide, secure, and protect. Right now I'm just getting ready for you. My focus is on God right now. Then comes myself, because I am yours. Either being in the missions field, or an employee somewhere, or an entrepreneur. Or all of the above. I get down and ill, it's okay. God's grace has given me the drive to survive. I know that you are present. I know that you are going to be my biggest advocate. I want you to be happy. I love you!
Love, John!
Hi! I don't know where to begin. Whitney Houston died. So sad... I want to quote her right now: And I will alwayssss LOVEEEE YOU!! It's also the grammy's tonight. So there's a lot happening. Church is always exciting! I love our God! I cried a little bit at church today. I just need God. That's it. I don't even know if you exist. I know God exist. That's all I need. I love Him so much. He keeps me going. And hopefully to you, one day. I almost couldn't be able to write to you today. That would be sad. There's been a lot going on. I won't make an excuse. I'm writing now.
Trying to do my finances today. I also tried to assess my options for the future. I really want a house. Where we can start a family. I love you! I'm applying to a handful of school to continue my education. Also seeking a new career path. So that I can thyde more give you more shopping money. Then this verse came to my mind.
Matthew 6:24-25 ”No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money. “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing?
I'm not worried. I tend to be anxious. I'm actually more excited. I won't be alone. I have you. We can do this. I will provide, secure, and protect. Right now I'm just getting ready for you. My focus is on God right now. Then comes myself, because I am yours. Either being in the missions field, or an employee somewhere, or an entrepreneur. Or all of the above. I get down and ill, it's okay. God's grace has given me the drive to survive. I know that you are present. I know that you are going to be my biggest advocate. I want you to be happy. I love you!
Love, John!
Saturday, February 11, 2012
Eleventh
Best Fren!
I had an amazing night last night even though I haven't fixed my car yet. I had a meeting with a jeweler. You are going to be a little be excited that our future together will be fruitful and you'll be thankful for the sparkles. I don't really understand how women are in love with jewelry and how they like to show it off. I sat down for 3 hours assessing these auctions. I can't wait to give you a gift that's going to blow your mind. The prices for these things are ridiculous, but with my newly acquired friend who's a veteran with jewelry. I think I know where to go from now on. And I'm sure that you'll meet her.
A month from today, I turn 28. I am excited! My life has been beautiful and you being a part of it makes it just more brighter than it is. I want to live to a hundred and see our great grand kids do a fish grab-nose lift-360 using forklifts. I can just see that happening since we're already doing snow mobile tricks these days. I don't know how old you are at this moment you reading these letters. I just know that I love you until you die. I want to die with you when that day comes. If you go to heaven first, I will always look at your photographs and listen to your voice over and over, until I come meet you in heaven. I can't wait to spend eternity with God, and with you in heaven one day.
So there's a passage in the bible that I wanted to share this time. It talks about loving your enemies and how we must be perfect as our heavenly Father is perfect.
God! You're beautiful! Your love for God is remarkably unspoken. I can't even describe it because God is glorified in your beauty. Thank you for being my best fren. That we can grow old together in whatever circumstances we discover along this journey. It's all about God, and loving Him. Then comes follows loving you and others. And then comes loving our enemies and loving all creation. In that order, we will be able to live a life that's fruitful and joyful all the time. Even in the midst of this imperfect world, we will persevere and take courage to fight. I will lead you to this battle against the flesh and against satan. God is with us! He's in you, in me, and in us together! It's soooo good!
xoxo, John
I had an amazing night last night even though I haven't fixed my car yet. I had a meeting with a jeweler. You are going to be a little be excited that our future together will be fruitful and you'll be thankful for the sparkles. I don't really understand how women are in love with jewelry and how they like to show it off. I sat down for 3 hours assessing these auctions. I can't wait to give you a gift that's going to blow your mind. The prices for these things are ridiculous, but with my newly acquired friend who's a veteran with jewelry. I think I know where to go from now on. And I'm sure that you'll meet her.
A month from today, I turn 28. I am excited! My life has been beautiful and you being a part of it makes it just more brighter than it is. I want to live to a hundred and see our great grand kids do a fish grab-nose lift-360 using forklifts. I can just see that happening since we're already doing snow mobile tricks these days. I don't know how old you are at this moment you reading these letters. I just know that I love you until you die. I want to die with you when that day comes. If you go to heaven first, I will always look at your photographs and listen to your voice over and over, until I come meet you in heaven. I can't wait to spend eternity with God, and with you in heaven one day.
So there's a passage in the bible that I wanted to share this time. It talks about loving your enemies and how we must be perfect as our heavenly Father is perfect.
Matthew 5:43-48 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet only your brothers, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same? You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.
God! You're beautiful! Your love for God is remarkably unspoken. I can't even describe it because God is glorified in your beauty. Thank you for being my best fren. That we can grow old together in whatever circumstances we discover along this journey. It's all about God, and loving Him. Then comes follows loving you and others. And then comes loving our enemies and loving all creation. In that order, we will be able to live a life that's fruitful and joyful all the time. Even in the midst of this imperfect world, we will persevere and take courage to fight. I will lead you to this battle against the flesh and against satan. God is with us! He's in you, in me, and in us together! It's soooo good!
xoxo, John
Friday, February 10, 2012
Tenth
My Love,
Ten Days. I love you, and will always will. I had my check up yesterday. My heart is intermittent. It's irregular. I haven't been feeling well lately. My whole body feels regular, my heart's just not acting up normal. It's okay. I strive to live for God, and one day with you. I live to love God, and everybody. "Love is from God and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God" -1 John 4:7. I just want to love you and see you happy. It's less of me, and more of you. And there's always plenty of Jesus!!
Yesterday was just a poop of a day. Its okay. There will be days like that. I know that when you and I, together, everything is better. You can be stressful sometimes, but also can be my stress reliever. God knows our hearts. My heart's already irregular. He knows every strange beat that my heart makes. I am and will be taking care of myself. I want you to know that I am yours and that I will do whatever it takes to make you feel safe, secure, and cared for. You are my sunshine!
I woke up this morning with some positive energy. Instead of me, just trying to figure out this journey. I'm just going to take it. You and I will be joining each other to a lot of travels and adventures. I want you to know that I support wherever you go, and that I would want you to come with me wherever I go. Together, we can follow Christ! :)
Take care, John
Ten Days. I love you, and will always will. I had my check up yesterday. My heart is intermittent. It's irregular. I haven't been feeling well lately. My whole body feels regular, my heart's just not acting up normal. It's okay. I strive to live for God, and one day with you. I live to love God, and everybody. "Love is from God and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God" -1 John 4:7. I just want to love you and see you happy. It's less of me, and more of you. And there's always plenty of Jesus!!
Yesterday was just a poop of a day. Its okay. There will be days like that. I know that when you and I, together, everything is better. You can be stressful sometimes, but also can be my stress reliever. God knows our hearts. My heart's already irregular. He knows every strange beat that my heart makes. I am and will be taking care of myself. I want you to know that I am yours and that I will do whatever it takes to make you feel safe, secure, and cared for. You are my sunshine!
I woke up this morning with some positive energy. Instead of me, just trying to figure out this journey. I'm just going to take it. You and I will be joining each other to a lot of travels and adventures. I want you to know that I support wherever you go, and that I would want you to come with me wherever I go. Together, we can follow Christ! :)
Take care, John
Thursday, February 9, 2012
9th
To my wife,
Hello! I have my health check up today. I am nervous. My heart hasn't been acting well lately. God's been challenging me a lot lately. I pray that whatever challenges that God puts in front of us, we can peacefully go through it together. I was literally in tears last night just in so much pain emotionally and physically. I know that I can cry in front of you. I just want to say "hi" and I love you.
1 Peter 1:22 Having purified your souls by your obedience to the truth for a sincere brotherly/sisterly love, love one another earnestly from a pure heart,
My heart is broken daily with my own struggles, perhaps of my selfish desires. Let God's will be done. Not mine. I only want people to be happy. And often times my happiness depends on what makes others happy and comfortable. I want a pure heart that serves God and others. Who am I to desire things for my own good. As much as I want to take care of myself, I want to take care of you, my love. I care too much that it hurts sometimes. The world isn't perfect, we're not perfect and I know that we're going to have struggles and often times things won't go our way. I believe that if we focus on God, and continue loving one another we will be filled with joy in this world that demands a comfortable life to be happy. I love you, and I will do consistently love you even in the good and bad days.
Love, John
Hello! I have my health check up today. I am nervous. My heart hasn't been acting well lately. God's been challenging me a lot lately. I pray that whatever challenges that God puts in front of us, we can peacefully go through it together. I was literally in tears last night just in so much pain emotionally and physically. I know that I can cry in front of you. I just want to say "hi" and I love you.
1 Peter 1:22 Having purified your souls by your obedience to the truth for a sincere brotherly/sisterly love, love one another earnestly from a pure heart,
My heart is broken daily with my own struggles, perhaps of my selfish desires. Let God's will be done. Not mine. I only want people to be happy. And often times my happiness depends on what makes others happy and comfortable. I want a pure heart that serves God and others. Who am I to desire things for my own good. As much as I want to take care of myself, I want to take care of you, my love. I care too much that it hurts sometimes. The world isn't perfect, we're not perfect and I know that we're going to have struggles and often times things won't go our way. I believe that if we focus on God, and continue loving one another we will be filled with joy in this world that demands a comfortable life to be happy. I love you, and I will do consistently love you even in the good and bad days.
Love, John
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
8th
My Darling,
Good morning! I read Ephesians 4 this morning and verse 2 really got my attention. "humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love". My love for you is humble and gentle. I want to be more patient about it. I will bear with you till the end. My love, this is going to be an exciting adventure. You, Me, God.
I had a fun experience last night chatting w/ a female student who's given up in life and given up w/ God. I pray that you're good with kids. Especially with your women. I do not understand them sometimes. I tried to share the truth with her. She didn't want to listen. She's fine. I just hope and pray that she comes back to her senses and believe that Jesus is the only truth, the way, the light.
You make me happy! There's so much going on around us. I know that at the end of everyday, I can always come to you. We can come to Christ together. I would like that!
Love, John
Good morning! I read Ephesians 4 this morning and verse 2 really got my attention. "humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love". My love for you is humble and gentle. I want to be more patient about it. I will bear with you till the end. My love, this is going to be an exciting adventure. You, Me, God.
I had a fun experience last night chatting w/ a female student who's given up in life and given up w/ God. I pray that you're good with kids. Especially with your women. I do not understand them sometimes. I tried to share the truth with her. She didn't want to listen. She's fine. I just hope and pray that she comes back to her senses and believe that Jesus is the only truth, the way, the light.
You make me happy! There's so much going on around us. I know that at the end of everyday, I can always come to you. We can come to Christ together. I would like that!
Love, John
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
7th
Hi
I hope you're doing well. Seventh day of writing to you. I don't even know if you exist. I pray that I get the energy to be committed to this challenge. This week has been little bit intense for me. With taxes, health checks, works, job apps, valentines, family, etc. We live in this world where everyone is constantly doing something. I want to share everything with you. We have our lives to be in each other's arms. I want you to feel free when you're with me. Not to use it as an opportunity of the flesh, but through love, we can serve each other. That's found in Galatians 5:13. :)
I love you! Can we just serve each other all the time and serve God above all things? Amen! I do not doubt my own self that if I have to do the dishes, clean the bathroom, put gas in your car, walk the dog, etc. I will gladly do you favors because there's that fire inside of me that just keeps me going, and that is you. You inspire me to aim high, work hard, and be classy all at once.
Time to get to a meeting. There will be plenty of these in the future. I can't wait to tell you all about it one day.
Sincerely, John
I hope you're doing well. Seventh day of writing to you. I don't even know if you exist. I pray that I get the energy to be committed to this challenge. This week has been little bit intense for me. With taxes, health checks, works, job apps, valentines, family, etc. We live in this world where everyone is constantly doing something. I want to share everything with you. We have our lives to be in each other's arms. I want you to feel free when you're with me. Not to use it as an opportunity of the flesh, but through love, we can serve each other. That's found in Galatians 5:13. :)
I love you! Can we just serve each other all the time and serve God above all things? Amen! I do not doubt my own self that if I have to do the dishes, clean the bathroom, put gas in your car, walk the dog, etc. I will gladly do you favors because there's that fire inside of me that just keeps me going, and that is you. You inspire me to aim high, work hard, and be classy all at once.
Time to get to a meeting. There will be plenty of these in the future. I can't wait to tell you all about it one day.
Sincerely, John
Monday, February 6, 2012
6th
Honey!
It's National froyo day. This makes me happy. Who doesn't like froyo? I will get you a gallon of froyo when this day comes again, each year that I am with you.
I found this quote on this movie, The Notebook. I'm sure you know about it.
Relationships aren't easy. There's plenty of stumbling blocks along the way. I want to go through all of that with you. I want to to love you forever and ever. We're going to have bills, mopey days, sick days, unlikable people, disasters, accidents, etc. The way we handle things would shape our future.
The only real law that we should follow is LOVE. Everything else falls in that category. You are my love. Have a blessed day. Thank you Lord for everything! ie. froyo! :)
Love, John
It's National froyo day. This makes me happy. Who doesn't like froyo? I will get you a gallon of froyo when this day comes again, each year that I am with you.
I found this quote on this movie, The Notebook. I'm sure you know about it.
"That's what we do, we fight! You tell me when I'm being an arrogant son of a bitch and I tell you when you're being a pain in the ass, which you are 99% of the time. I'm not afraid to hurt your feelings. You have like a 2 second rebound rate and your back doing the next pain in the ass thing. So it's not gonna be easy. It's gonna be really hard and we're gonna have to work at this everyday. But I wanna do that because I want you, I want all of you, forever, you and me, everyday." - Noah
Relationships aren't easy. There's plenty of stumbling blocks along the way. I want to go through all of that with you. I want to to love you forever and ever. We're going to have bills, mopey days, sick days, unlikable people, disasters, accidents, etc. The way we handle things would shape our future.
Romans 13:8 Owe no one anything, except to love each other, for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law.
The only real law that we should follow is LOVE. Everything else falls in that category. You are my love. Have a blessed day. Thank you Lord for everything! ie. froyo! :)
Love, John
Sunday, February 5, 2012
5th
My love,
I am extremely tired. It's Sunday morning, and it's time for some superbowl this afternoon. I just cooked for 30 people last night. I am a good cook, and you love me because I cook well. lol. I will cook for you everyday is possible. I won't be lazy about it. I'd be happy to be serving you! You my best fren'!
We're children of God! We're so blessed with so many gifts and talents. You are amazing at what you do! I believe in you! God loves us so much that He calls us His children. He made the universe. He made everything. He made you beautiful and lovely! I love you so much that I want to call you my wife. And we can glorify God and serve Him to our maximum capacity. He is our father in heaven. You and I can be partners in worshiping Him forever. Wouldn't that be exciting? I'm excited to be thinking about it. I'm excited worshipping Him alone, imagine having someone forever worshiping Him. Ah, majestic!!
I have to go to church. I'm excited! I love you!
John
I am extremely tired. It's Sunday morning, and it's time for some superbowl this afternoon. I just cooked for 30 people last night. I am a good cook, and you love me because I cook well. lol. I will cook for you everyday is possible. I won't be lazy about it. I'd be happy to be serving you! You my best fren'!
We're children of God! We're so blessed with so many gifts and talents. You are amazing at what you do! I believe in you! God loves us so much that He calls us His children. He made the universe. He made everything. He made you beautiful and lovely! I love you so much that I want to call you my wife. And we can glorify God and serve Him to our maximum capacity. He is our father in heaven. You and I can be partners in worshiping Him forever. Wouldn't that be exciting? I'm excited to be thinking about it. I'm excited worshipping Him alone, imagine having someone forever worshiping Him. Ah, majestic!!
I have to go to church. I'm excited! I love you!
John
Saturday, February 4, 2012
4th
Hello Darling!
It's Saturday morning! I just want to make you breakfast! Because I love you! And because I want to serve you breakfast. If possible; I'd pick flowers to go with those pancakes, eggs, bacon, and sausage. In our little house somewhere. I cannot even fathom how awesome it'd be like to be waking up right next to you. Wonderful!
God serves me breakfast by the glory of the sun just giving light to the morning. When that sun hits your face, I see an angel. "We were both crucified in Christ It is no longer I, or us who live, but Christ who lives in us. And the life we now live in the flesh we live by faith in the Son of God who loved us and gave His life for us." -Gal 2:20. Boom! I want my darling to be living in Christ ready to take on her day with a smile on her face. That would be my prayer daily.
I'm semi hosting a birthday tonight for a friend's bday party. She's kind of like that big sister that I never had. I'm cooking for all her guest, about 30+ people. I'm making 'brenner'. I can be you chef and you can be my guest at our own house. We can cook together! Food made with love is the best food there is! nom nom nom!
Love, John
It's Saturday morning! I just want to make you breakfast! Because I love you! And because I want to serve you breakfast. If possible; I'd pick flowers to go with those pancakes, eggs, bacon, and sausage. In our little house somewhere. I cannot even fathom how awesome it'd be like to be waking up right next to you. Wonderful!
God serves me breakfast by the glory of the sun just giving light to the morning. When that sun hits your face, I see an angel. "We were both crucified in Christ It is no longer I, or us who live, but Christ who lives in us. And the life we now live in the flesh we live by faith in the Son of God who loved us and gave His life for us." -Gal 2:20. Boom! I want my darling to be living in Christ ready to take on her day with a smile on her face. That would be my prayer daily.
I'm semi hosting a birthday tonight for a friend's bday party. She's kind of like that big sister that I never had. I'm cooking for all her guest, about 30+ people. I'm making 'brenner'. I can be you chef and you can be my guest at our own house. We can cook together! Food made with love is the best food there is! nom nom nom!
Love, John
Friday, February 3, 2012
3rd
My Dear,
I go back to Los Angeles today. I am sick. My nose is like a faucet. I woke up this morning sore and cold. I think I have a fever. Also, my left pinkie, I think is sprained. It looks funny. I'm sitting in my hotel room waiting for the sun to rise up. Then I wonder how this experience would be like with you by my side?! To be waking up by you every single day of my life. Super rad!
Before I love you, I love God. God loves you and I. We are more than conquerors through him who loved us. Nothing in all creation will separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord. Words from Romans 8:37...39. Nothing can separate us. I am praying right now that our lives will be one with God, and one with each other. I will love you forever until I die. That's the point of being one in Christ. Jesus died for us, and now He lives in us.
I don't feel very well. I think I'm sick. Great. For sickness and in health we shall be together.
Love, John
I go back to Los Angeles today. I am sick. My nose is like a faucet. I woke up this morning sore and cold. I think I have a fever. Also, my left pinkie, I think is sprained. It looks funny. I'm sitting in my hotel room waiting for the sun to rise up. Then I wonder how this experience would be like with you by my side?! To be waking up by you every single day of my life. Super rad!
Before I love you, I love God. God loves you and I. We are more than conquerors through him who loved us. Nothing in all creation will separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord. Words from Romans 8:37...39. Nothing can separate us. I am praying right now that our lives will be one with God, and one with each other. I will love you forever until I die. That's the point of being one in Christ. Jesus died for us, and now He lives in us.
I don't feel very well. I think I'm sick. Great. For sickness and in health we shall be together.
Love, John
Thursday, February 2, 2012
2nd
My Dearest,
Hi! Good morning! I am at Winter Park, in Colorado! About to go skiing! I want to share a passage with you today in the book of Romans 5:8 "but God show His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us". That is wickedly amazing! You're amazing! God's amazing! We're all amazing!
While I don't know why I'm writing this is bizarre. And one day you'll be reading these letters and be laughing that I made a goofball out of myself. I will die for you any day. If I could love you like God is to the church, that is my goal for my life with you.
I was here for business and yesterdays' interviews were just great. I'm not sure where we'd be living by now because I'm applying in other states and maybe even in other countries for a new job. I still dream of starting up my own. This is a good stepping stone for that vision, for now. I've gone through a lot in my careers and I value you more than my jobs. By now, you know that I'm a busy body. I love being active and being able to share my activities with you. You inspire every decision that I make. You make me smile when things aren't alright. You light up any room that you're in. To see your beauty is enough for me to strive to provide, to protect, and to care for you.
I and LOVE and YOU
Hi! Good morning! I am at Winter Park, in Colorado! About to go skiing! I want to share a passage with you today in the book of Romans 5:8 "but God show His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us". That is wickedly amazing! You're amazing! God's amazing! We're all amazing!
While I don't know why I'm writing this is bizarre. And one day you'll be reading these letters and be laughing that I made a goofball out of myself. I will die for you any day. If I could love you like God is to the church, that is my goal for my life with you.
I was here for business and yesterdays' interviews were just great. I'm not sure where we'd be living by now because I'm applying in other states and maybe even in other countries for a new job. I still dream of starting up my own. This is a good stepping stone for that vision, for now. I've gone through a lot in my careers and I value you more than my jobs. By now, you know that I'm a busy body. I love being active and being able to share my activities with you. You inspire every decision that I make. You make me smile when things aren't alright. You light up any room that you're in. To see your beauty is enough for me to strive to provide, to protect, and to care for you.
I and LOVE and YOU
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
1st
Dearly Beloved,
Hi! I love you! I don't know how you'd feel about this, but I'm writing this to you before even knowing that I get to spend my entire life by you. It's the beginning of February, year 2012. I am currently in Denver, Colorado. I'm here for some job interviews, and skiing. Also wanted to escape LA, and do something super spontaneous. I have an interview at Aerotek today at 9 and then a lunch interview with Leprino foods. Both positions are mainly in the research field. By now, I'm probably working at either or neither.
(This is harder than it is)
This is my first letter, so bare with me.
My love, thank you. Thank you for everything. The love, the joy, the hope, the life we will live. I get to praise Jesus with you when we wake up, and thank Him before we go to bed forever. That itself is a gift. You are a gift. I am blessed. Thank you!
God loved the world that He gave His only son Jesus. He loves me. He loves you. He loves everybody. He gave me you. He loves us both that we have Him and be waiting for Him to come again. :)
"Life without you is like facebook without friends, youtube without videos, and Google without results".
Hi! I love you! I don't know how you'd feel about this, but I'm writing this to you before even knowing that I get to spend my entire life by you. It's the beginning of February, year 2012. I am currently in Denver, Colorado. I'm here for some job interviews, and skiing. Also wanted to escape LA, and do something super spontaneous. I have an interview at Aerotek today at 9 and then a lunch interview with Leprino foods. Both positions are mainly in the research field. By now, I'm probably working at either or neither.
(This is harder than it is)
This is my first letter, so bare with me.
My love, thank you. Thank you for everything. The love, the joy, the hope, the life we will live. I get to praise Jesus with you when we wake up, and thank Him before we go to bed forever. That itself is a gift. You are a gift. I am blessed. Thank you!
God loved the world that He gave His only son Jesus. He loves me. He loves you. He loves everybody. He gave me you. He loves us both that we have Him and be waiting for Him to come again. :)
"Life without you is like facebook without friends, youtube without videos, and Google without results".
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Valentines Project
To start off the month of February. I think I'm going to write my "future wife" a love letter for the entire month of February 2012. I am single at the moment. I dream of having a family one day. That dream starts with me. The wife has to be pursued daily. I want to write a story line. My ambition in life is to not make my life boring. Like to dream of having the next best car, or get a high earning job, or have the same days every day. Let's make this interesting.
Let's make this interesting. In these letters there's character. First, there'd be a character, ME! Then the character would want something ie. Jesus, her, ice cream, a house, etc. Then the character has to over an enormous amount of conflict in order to get whatever they want. Then they get it! That's it. That's the recipe to a good story. I can write these letter, but I have to live it out when the time comes.
The things people 'like' these days are boring, shallow, and plain. I want to focus on sacrifice, risk, commitment, and love. I want something to happen and envision it. Time to take control of my life and make it more interesting and meaningful. I'm going to live it as a story. The conflicts that I face isn't something that I dread, it's something I welcome. Relationships has unlimited amounts of hills to climb and joy to dive to. I want to love my "future wife" to the best of my ability. God doesn't want us to be alone. He is always present in our lives even when life is too much to handle. I don't want to be alone in my golden age. I am content to be single for now.
So in the next 29 days.. I will be writing a story, a love story to my surely be wonderful future wife. I don't know who she is, perhaps she knows who I am. Perhaps I already know her. God only knows. I am just in great awe that God made men a companion in a woman. He doesn't want us to be alone. Everyday's a ministry. Leggo!
Let's make this interesting. In these letters there's character. First, there'd be a character, ME! Then the character would want something ie. Jesus, her, ice cream, a house, etc. Then the character has to over an enormous amount of conflict in order to get whatever they want. Then they get it! That's it. That's the recipe to a good story. I can write these letter, but I have to live it out when the time comes.
The things people 'like' these days are boring, shallow, and plain. I want to focus on sacrifice, risk, commitment, and love. I want something to happen and envision it. Time to take control of my life and make it more interesting and meaningful. I'm going to live it as a story. The conflicts that I face isn't something that I dread, it's something I welcome. Relationships has unlimited amounts of hills to climb and joy to dive to. I want to love my "future wife" to the best of my ability. God doesn't want us to be alone. He is always present in our lives even when life is too much to handle. I don't want to be alone in my golden age. I am content to be single for now.
So in the next 29 days.. I will be writing a story, a love story to my surely be wonderful future wife. I don't know who she is, perhaps she knows who I am. Perhaps I already know her. God only knows. I am just in great awe that God made men a companion in a woman. He doesn't want us to be alone. Everyday's a ministry. Leggo!
Friday, January 27, 2012
Discombobulated
Pray. I pray.
Give. I give.
Praise. I worship.
Apologize. I'm sorry.
Surrender. I persist.
Live. I breathe.
This first month of 2012 has been interesting. Faithful, I have been. Patience, I'm praying. God's challenging me a lot in different ways: in health, in wealth, in goodness, and bad. This year's goals are beyond ahead of schedule. Which I think is good. I keep trying to understand certain things for over three weeks now. I try to find answers through the word. The word only explains what the world offers, and that "He who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world"-1 John 4:4. Therefore, I am completely in "ME and HIM" mode the past few weeks. Keeping the fire that is burning inside of me. The need/want of what the world is yelling at me is a fairy tale of a story. I awareness of true love encompasses Jesus. And I am at His service and to all His people.
Not to be rude or anything. I want to see people know Him. I want people to grow in Him. I want people to live a life full of Him. My selfish desires can be replaced by the thought of how can I become a better man for Him. If that's going to involve moving somewhere, or working at a new place, or buying a house, or pursuing a woman, or going back to school, or taking tango lessons, etc. I will. My heart is fixed on Him. But the world keeps rattling it. It's already literally unstable, and it hasn't been feeling great lately. I do what I do, but I feel is not what I want to feel. I know what I know, and I only know what my five senses pick up. To be reading beyond the society, culture, and lifestyle is beyond me. I understand the general idea, but each individual is different. I say what I say because I am concern. I like to challenge myself and others with truth and love. How can I be a cynical man in someone's point of view if they won't even welcome the true me.
Everything is seen from the outside. Men and women are easily deceived by actions, attitude, and assets. What happened to perseverance, character, and hope? This is why I love going to places such as rescue mission places, and rehab places where they offer people a new beginning. They're there getting clean, getting God's word, and understanding that what really matter is their character and not what the world throws at them. Anybody can make their own choice, but in the end if what you want comes true or not. The reality of how God really views that is by the reaction to His will. Let His will be done.. Yes! Even when things are super difficult and I am getting closer and closer to my death. To Him be the glory. Or when things are full of satisfaction. The right things are just flowing accordingly to what we want and what makes us happy, to Him be the glory.
It sounds like I'm obsesses with my god. Well, I kind of am. He is first, and I am second. All the science, business, and recreation that's consuming my daily life is just a subdivision of my life. The main point of my life is to be following Jesus. Things get me side tracked. My own wants, and my own dreams get in the way of my walk with Jesus. I get too focused on me rather than be focusing on Him. I'm too concerned for my own reputation, but that doesn't really matter. All these false teachings, and feel good temporary psychic techniques can work for now, but only Jesus really heals. I pray all the time even when my heart won't stop beating rapidly. I want to leave a legacy. I don't want to live a life thinking what would it be like with the "if's. I am often lost, I feel like that's part of following the shepherd. I'm just a sheep amongst sheep. I believe that my heart will come in peace w/ my mind. Always be praying. Yes. :)
Thursday, January 12, 2012
Interaction is a Need
The way things work shouldn't be complicated. One acts, one reacts. Energy stored, energy transfered. There are times when nothing is really working. No reaction, no energy transfer, no response. Usually, there's a reason behind everything. God had a reason why he created things, destroy things, renew things, and resolve things. He desired to share life with others. As men and women of Christ, we desire relationships with each other. Unfortunately sometime we desire relationships from others first before we do with God. Only if we desire God first and more than anything else. Then the rest will just flow like honey. The more we get closer to Him, the more life becomes joyful and worth living. In any way, shape, or form life just becomes more full. It's not a "just" but it's Jesus who makes life worth every second of it.
Humans crave relationship. As soon as we say a word to someone, there's a relationship built from a "hi, how are you?" to a nod acknowledging them. Out bodies are like ships. When we see another ship in the open seas, we see them on our radars. We know they're there. Some we chose to radio, some we pass by. Some we become attached too, some you run away from, and some we sink. This wide array of water is overseen by God. He created all things and He sees over and under everything. People have a certain way of addressing people. It does say in the bible in Luke chapter 6, to do to others what you want to be done to you. If that golden rule is applied to everyone on this earth, then maybe this earth wouldn't be so wrecked. I just want to love w/o expecting anything back. I just want to give w/o questioning. I just want to laugh out of nothing. I just want to give you a hug because you breathe. Men and women have existed this long, so something is working. However, I'm guessing over 70% of this world is broken. Most of it has to do with relationships. Either parents, family, friend, co-worker, spouse, kid, girlfriend, boyfriend, acquaintance, lab partner, teacher, mayor, waiter, etc. we're all connected by a web of people. We live because of people. Imagine if we live because of Jesus. People, whether they make you happy or not, we'd still love them no matter what.
Those who don't believe still lives and needs relationships from fellow humans for a reason. Whether it'd be themselves, some other god, or a thing. The human brain shuts down without people around it. We're wired to talk, think, and feel. Even if you get stuck on an island alone for months. You will either lose your mind or make something your imaginary friend and talk to them even if they don't talk back. For example: "Wilsom" from Cast away. It kept Chuck, Tom Hanks, sane as he tries to survive in this dessert island. What kept him from living was his will and love for the woman of his life. Kelly, played by Helen Hunt. In that locket was her picture. It gave him courage, will power, and strength to continue life. It wasn't easy, but he survive in that island. I know, it's a film, but people in this world actually have experienced being alone for a long period of time. Alone, being stuck in an island, in a building, an elevator, the jungle, etc. I can't even imagine that feeling. The fact that I can always look up in the sky and talk to God is great, but to not have anybody to talk too, think about, and feel for a long period of time is an unhappy place to be. Therefore, we live with for God, and with people.
Humans crave relationship. As soon as we say a word to someone, there's a relationship built from a "hi, how are you?" to a nod acknowledging them. Out bodies are like ships. When we see another ship in the open seas, we see them on our radars. We know they're there. Some we chose to radio, some we pass by. Some we become attached too, some you run away from, and some we sink. This wide array of water is overseen by God. He created all things and He sees over and under everything. People have a certain way of addressing people. It does say in the bible in Luke chapter 6, to do to others what you want to be done to you. If that golden rule is applied to everyone on this earth, then maybe this earth wouldn't be so wrecked. I just want to love w/o expecting anything back. I just want to give w/o questioning. I just want to laugh out of nothing. I just want to give you a hug because you breathe. Men and women have existed this long, so something is working. However, I'm guessing over 70% of this world is broken. Most of it has to do with relationships. Either parents, family, friend, co-worker, spouse, kid, girlfriend, boyfriend, acquaintance, lab partner, teacher, mayor, waiter, etc. we're all connected by a web of people. We live because of people. Imagine if we live because of Jesus. People, whether they make you happy or not, we'd still love them no matter what.
Those who don't believe still lives and needs relationships from fellow humans for a reason. Whether it'd be themselves, some other god, or a thing. The human brain shuts down without people around it. We're wired to talk, think, and feel. Even if you get stuck on an island alone for months. You will either lose your mind or make something your imaginary friend and talk to them even if they don't talk back. For example: "Wilsom" from Cast away. It kept Chuck, Tom Hanks, sane as he tries to survive in this dessert island. What kept him from living was his will and love for the woman of his life. Kelly, played by Helen Hunt. In that locket was her picture. It gave him courage, will power, and strength to continue life. It wasn't easy, but he survive in that island. I know, it's a film, but people in this world actually have experienced being alone for a long period of time. Alone, being stuck in an island, in a building, an elevator, the jungle, etc. I can't even imagine that feeling. The fact that I can always look up in the sky and talk to God is great, but to not have anybody to talk too, think about, and feel for a long period of time is an unhappy place to be. Therefore, we live with for God, and with people.
Friday, January 6, 2012
Mama! Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Bithday Mama!
On the 4th of January back in 1961, my beloved mother, Grace was born. Love her tons!
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Christmas & New Year 2012
Christmas Joy!
I was in Utah for a few days before Christmas and got back into town on the eve of Christmas. Interestingly enough after a 10 hour drive back to Los Angeles, I had enough energy to sing with the choir and attend the Christmas eve service. I wanted to go to church for Christmas. There wasn't any certainty of how long my uncle and his family wanted to stay in Cedar City, Utah. However I really wanted to go skiing in Utah and try out the snow mobiles. Sooo good! I was also a little sick and sad that week, but I'm okay now.
Christmas day was fun! I took my room mate to the airport at 430am. Watched the sun rise from the east and was over joyed that Jesus is born! I was just happy. Reasons only God can explain. There wasn't really anything exciting going on for me for Christmas. I just was greeting everyone a Merry Christmas. I called those whom I really really wanted to talk to and I went to go visit my mom and her family for lunch. It was mellow. I wasn't really expecting any presents. Just to see people happy was wonderful to me. I wrapped, bagged, and ordered most of my beloved presents and most of them were already received. I went home after spending time with my family and the Lakers loosing their season opener. Spent time with Iggy, and napped. That was my Christmas. It was merry! I had joy and peace in my heart.
The week between Christmas and New Years is like heaven week. Worked for two days and then spent the rest of the week enjoying my time with people and friends. I made the most of that week. I think I had breakfast, lunch, and dinner with people everyday that week. Such a good week of just relaxing, eating, and adventuring! I pretty much hung out with students 80% of the time. It's been real. I tried having a plan, but things doesn't usually work out. Its okay. In anything that I do, do it with joy! Yes, Philippians 4.
New Years Eve!
Yes! Party! Fun! Saying toodles to 2011 was about as fun as peeling a tangerine. I love 2011, there's definitely moments of extreme gladness and times of conflicts. It was a learning year. A year of great risk, great results, and great failures. I must say that I've learned a lot from last year. Always learning... It's so good. NYE was spent partying with my best frens! I am very blessed to have frens with the same morals and values. NYE has always been a time of year where I go monkeys. We're changing. I know, I'm changing. I'm getting older. I'm feeling wiser and more mature. I feel like I should be a dad. I am one to about 90 jr highers. lol... I know that's weird, but I feel like I'm 50 or something. It's a good feeling. I still rock the house with some party rockin. 2011 was a gateway from being a young adult, to an adult. It's good. It's all temporary, God's smiling at me. I know He is. :)
2012 will be interesting. Great things are still to come! Greater things are still to be done in this city!! There are no such things as resolutions. There are goals and to-do list for 2012, but life could throw me a coconut and totally can catch me off guard like it did last year. I learned my lesson from that. This world is so interesting and fun. It's not a game, but it can be competitive. Just with work, relationships, and mission. I can't control this world and the people in this world, but I can always adjust and adapt to it. God is with us. There's this fortune cookie that I saw once that says 'men do not fail... they give up trying. I'm the kind of man that doesn't really give up. It's 95% mental. So here it goes... things that would be nice to have accomplished by 2012.
-Read the whole bible again
-Reconnect with my dad
-Bring family to jof
-Talk missions to the missional pastor of jof
-Teach a class at church
-Change careers
-Take steps to start a non profit
-Get rid of my heart problem
-Write a book
-Give up donuts
-To not chew with my mouth open
-Fitness and healthy living
-Take dancing again
-Cook more
- Shop less
-Drive less
- Say "i love you" to my momma
- See my sister finish college
- Surfing again
- Pursue a beautiful woman of God
- Pier to pier
- Alcatraz, maybe
- Less cocky, more humility
- See more kids and adults saved
- Get published in a science journal
- Plant my own garden
- Iggy, learn a new trick
- Encourage more & be positive
- Take steps on build a house project
- Take care of myself more
- Become more open and inviting
-...... more that God has planned for me this year. :)
I was in Utah for a few days before Christmas and got back into town on the eve of Christmas. Interestingly enough after a 10 hour drive back to Los Angeles, I had enough energy to sing with the choir and attend the Christmas eve service. I wanted to go to church for Christmas. There wasn't any certainty of how long my uncle and his family wanted to stay in Cedar City, Utah. However I really wanted to go skiing in Utah and try out the snow mobiles. Sooo good! I was also a little sick and sad that week, but I'm okay now.
Christmas day was fun! I took my room mate to the airport at 430am. Watched the sun rise from the east and was over joyed that Jesus is born! I was just happy. Reasons only God can explain. There wasn't really anything exciting going on for me for Christmas. I just was greeting everyone a Merry Christmas. I called those whom I really really wanted to talk to and I went to go visit my mom and her family for lunch. It was mellow. I wasn't really expecting any presents. Just to see people happy was wonderful to me. I wrapped, bagged, and ordered most of my beloved presents and most of them were already received. I went home after spending time with my family and the Lakers loosing their season opener. Spent time with Iggy, and napped. That was my Christmas. It was merry! I had joy and peace in my heart.
The week between Christmas and New Years is like heaven week. Worked for two days and then spent the rest of the week enjoying my time with people and friends. I made the most of that week. I think I had breakfast, lunch, and dinner with people everyday that week. Such a good week of just relaxing, eating, and adventuring! I pretty much hung out with students 80% of the time. It's been real. I tried having a plan, but things doesn't usually work out. Its okay. In anything that I do, do it with joy! Yes, Philippians 4.
New Years Eve!
Yes! Party! Fun! Saying toodles to 2011 was about as fun as peeling a tangerine. I love 2011, there's definitely moments of extreme gladness and times of conflicts. It was a learning year. A year of great risk, great results, and great failures. I must say that I've learned a lot from last year. Always learning... It's so good. NYE was spent partying with my best frens! I am very blessed to have frens with the same morals and values. NYE has always been a time of year where I go monkeys. We're changing. I know, I'm changing. I'm getting older. I'm feeling wiser and more mature. I feel like I should be a dad. I am one to about 90 jr highers. lol... I know that's weird, but I feel like I'm 50 or something. It's a good feeling. I still rock the house with some party rockin. 2011 was a gateway from being a young adult, to an adult. It's good. It's all temporary, God's smiling at me. I know He is. :)
2012 will be interesting. Great things are still to come! Greater things are still to be done in this city!! There are no such things as resolutions. There are goals and to-do list for 2012, but life could throw me a coconut and totally can catch me off guard like it did last year. I learned my lesson from that. This world is so interesting and fun. It's not a game, but it can be competitive. Just with work, relationships, and mission. I can't control this world and the people in this world, but I can always adjust and adapt to it. God is with us. There's this fortune cookie that I saw once that says 'men do not fail... they give up trying. I'm the kind of man that doesn't really give up. It's 95% mental. So here it goes... things that would be nice to have accomplished by 2012.
-Read the whole bible again
-Reconnect with my dad
-Bring family to jof
-Talk missions to the missional pastor of jof
-Teach a class at church
-Change careers
-Take steps to start a non profit
-Get rid of my heart problem
-Write a book
-Give up donuts
-To not chew with my mouth open
-Fitness and healthy living
-Take dancing again
-Cook more
- Shop less
-Drive less
- Say "i love you" to my momma
- See my sister finish college
- Surfing again
- Pursue a beautiful woman of God
- Pier to pier
- Alcatraz, maybe
- Less cocky, more humility
- See more kids and adults saved
- Get published in a science journal
- Plant my own garden
- Iggy, learn a new trick
- Encourage more & be positive
- Take steps on build a house project
- Take care of myself more
- Become more open and inviting
-...... more that God has planned for me this year. :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)